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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24235900">Crush On You</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/dojaefairy/pseuds/dojaefairy'>dojaefairy</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>NCT (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Canon Compliant, Eventual Happy Ending, Fluff, Friendship, Getting Together, Love Confessions, M/M, One-Sided Attraction, Romance, Smut, Unrequited Love, Untagged side pairings mentioned</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 19:28:03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>20,007</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24235900</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/dojaefairy/pseuds/dojaefairy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Jaehyun’s heart obviously doesn’t get that having a crush on a bandmate is the worst thing to do when being an idol. It’s stupid, but he didn’t exactly have a choice: from the very moment he met Doyoung, he fell for him – and hard at that because why have just a short-term crush on him when he could instead go through years of pining?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun/Kim Dongyoung | Doyoung, Suh Youngho | Johnny/Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun (one-sided), past Lee Taeyong/Kim Dongyoung | Doyoung (one-sided)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>97</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Crush On You</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hi! I hope everyone is being safe and that this fic might help you feel better if you're going through a hard time ♡♡♡ have a good time reading ♡</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Jaehyun’s heart obviously doesn’t get that having a crush on a bandmate is the worst thing to do when being an idol. Dating a non-celebrity from the opposite gender would already be difficult – but still doable – and so would be dating another idol, but Jaehyun’s weak heart decided to go for the hardest mode, aka falling in love with a bandmate of his own gender. It’s stupid, but he didn’t exactly have a choice: from the very moment he met Doyoung, he fell for him – and hard at that because why have just a short-term crush on him when he could instead go through years of pining?</p><p>Jaehyun sighs for what must be the 20<sup>th</sup> time this hour, and Johnny looks up to give him a judgmental look.</p><p>“Sigh one more time,” Johnny warns, starting in English, “and I swear I’ll kill you,” he finishes in Korean.</p><p>Jaehyun gives him the puppy eyes, to which his best friend answers by kicking him. Jaehyun swiftly avoids the hit, but pouts even more.</p><p>“I can tell what you’re thinking and it’s annoying me,” Johnny adds, knotting his eyebrows in a frown, “just do something about your situation or I’m kicking you out of my room.”</p><p>“But you’re my best friend!” Jaehyun gasps, and Johnny rolls his eyes.</p><p>They’ve already had that conversation way too many times, which might explain why Johnny is done with Jaehyun’s arguments.</p><p>“Does being your best friend imply I have to suffer through you pining over Doyoung like you’ve been doing the past 10 years?” Johnny challenges, “his room is literally on the other side of the living room, you can just walk there, make out with him and stop whining like a dog in heat in here.”</p><p>“Shush!” Jaehyun blushes as though Doyoung could hear them talk about him, “it hasn’t been 10 years and I don’t sound like a dog in heat!”</p><p>“I should record you moaning his name when you sleep,” Johnny shakes his head, and Jaehyun blanks.</p><p>“I… did I ever do that?” he asks, mortified.</p><p>It’d be the biggest lie to say that he’s never fantasized about Doyoung, but he takes care of such business on his own in the shower! The thought of having moaned Doyoung’s name while sleeping is awfully embarrassing.</p><p>“Okay, that was a lie,” Johnny admits with a shit-eating grin, “but you get my point. Seriously, it’s been literal years, why don’t you at least try?”</p><p>Jaehyun can’t bring himself to be too relieved about the name moaning part, because he’s feeling anxious again. Of course it’d be his dream to finally confess and ask his crush out, but the more time passes, the more afraid he grows.</p><p>“But I’m so scared,” Jaehyun admits sincerely, “I love him so much and I’ve loved him from afar for so long, I’m scared of getting rejected.”</p><p>Johnny’s smile turns softens, and he pats the space next to him on the bed. Jaehyun immediately sits there, and pretty much throws himself in Johnny’s arms as the latter tells him to come closer. Johnny wraps his arms around him in a solid embrace, and Jaehyun smiles happily.</p><p>“I know you’re scared,” Johnny says softly, “but I’m sure it’s worth a shot. I could totally see you and Doyoung date.”</p><p>“I want that so bad,” Jaehyun says, sighing, “I want nothing but that.”</p><p>There’s a pause, and Johnny speaks up again.</p><p>“Maybe I can look into the situation for you?”</p><p>Jaehyun looks up so quickly he almost headbutts him.</p><p>“What do you mean?”</p><p>“Well, Doyoung and Taeyong are best friends, right? I’m pretty close with Taeyong, so I could ask him what Doyoung thinks of you and if he reciprocates your feelings.”</p><p>“You’d do that for me?” Jaehyun asks, feeling emotional all of a sudden, “oh Johnny you’re the best!” he adds, hugging Johnny tighter than before.</p><p>“It’s just so I won’t have to hear you whine about Doyoung all the time,” Johnny corrects him, and Jaehyun lets out an embarrassed noise.</p>
<hr/><p>That evening, Johnny is on a mission. He’s done eating dinner and he knows Taeyong also ate earlier, so all that’s left is settle somewhere so they can talk. Unsure of where Taeyong went, Johnny checks his room first, and luckily, Taeyong is laying on his bed, busy with his phone.</p><p>“Hey, mind if I come in?” Johnny asks, and Taeyong shakes his head before putting his cell away.</p><p>“Nope, you’re good,” Taeyong answers, and he sits up before inviting Johnny to sit by him. “Do you need anything?”</p><p>“I wanted to talk with you about something,” Johnny answers, “it’s not about you but about Doyoung.”</p><p>Taeyong raises an eyebrow at that, the confusion visible on his face. He tilts his head.</p><p>“Why are you asking me then?”</p><p>“I can’t ask Doyoung directly,” Johnny explains, “it’s pretty personal but I can’t ask him.”</p><p>Taeyong looks even more confused.</p><p>“Okay?”</p><p>“I’m doing this for Jaehyun,” Johnny resumes, feeling like they’re in elementary school, “I don’t know if you’ve noticed but he really likes Doyoung and he wants to ask him out, but he wants to know how Doyoung feels about him first.”</p><p>Taeyong goes “oh”, and Johnny feels like the atmosphere has changed.</p><p>“Uh, are you okay?” he asks, and Taeyong forces out a laughter.</p><p>“It’s… okay, just give me a few seconds.”</p><p>He sighs, deeply, and runs a hand through his hair. Johnny remains silent, wondering what’s wrong, but he knows waiting is best. There’s no need to rush Taeyong.</p><p>“Okay, I’m good. Sorry, but that kinda brought bad memories,” he grimaces, and it’s Johnny’s time to be confused.</p><p>“Uh, I think I’m missing some elements here,” Johnny says, raising his eyebrows.</p><p>Taeyong sighs once more.</p><p>“First I’ll let you know that Doyoung definitely likes Jaehyun back, he’s liked him for a really long time.”</p><p>“Oh. Well, that’s good,” Johnny answers.</p><p>Taeyong nods, and his smile doesn’t look as forced anymore.</p><p>“Then… well, I don’t know if it’s ever been obvious but I used to be in love with Doyoung.”</p><p>Johnny gasps, absolutely flabbergasted.</p><p>“No way,” Johnny says, staring at Taeyong like he’s grown a second head.</p><p>“Yeah,” Taeyong admits, “but I never told him because I knew it was one-sided.”</p><p>Johnny lowers his head, empathizing with his friend.</p><p>“Basically, he told me that he loved Jaehyun when my own feelings for him were at their peak, so it was a pretty devastating time for me. It was even worse because nothing he had ever done or said implied he liked Jaehyun, and I even thought I’d have a chance with him because he was all like “you and me are soulmates, you’re my most favorite person”, only to just tell me out of the blue that he liked someone else one day.”</p><p>Taeyong takes a deep breath, and Johnny can tell how much it weighed on him.</p><p>“Does Kun know about that?” Johnny asks after a few seconds of silence.</p><p>“Yeah, of course, he’s my boyfriend after all,” Taeyong nods, “I’m all good now, it’s just that it still hurt a little when I think about it. But I’m completely over Doyoung romantically speaking, and if anything I’m happy I said nothing. He’s still my best friend and nothing has changed between us.”</p><p>Johnny hesitates, but he figures this is the best time to ask his question.</p><p>“So you think it’s better not to say anything?”</p><p>Taeyong looks at him, unsure.</p><p>“What do you mean?”</p><p>“If you like… no, love someone and they’re the most important person in your life but they don’t share your feelings, it’s better to keep quiet?”</p><p>Johnny meets Taeyong’s eyes, and Taeyong is frowning.</p><p>“I… I guess it depends on the person,” Taeyong stutters, “why are you asking that?”</p><p>“C’mon, can’t you tell?” Johnny fake laughs, “I like Jaehyun.”</p><p>“Oh no, Johnny,” Taeyong covers his mouth, “I’m so, so sorry.”</p><p>Johnny shrugs, and he looks down once more, his chest feeling less heavy now that he’s told someone.</p><p>“How long has it been?” Taeyong asks, getting closer so he can pull Johnny into a hug.</p><p>“I don’t even know,” Johnny confesses, and he wonders why his eyes feel wet, “all I know is that I love him more than anything,” he adds, and it takes him half a second to understand that he’s about to cry.</p><p>“Johnny,” Taeyong gently calls out, embracing Johnny’s waist and resting his chin on his shoulder, “you can cry if it makes you feel better. And you can tell me anything, please don’t keep it all bottled up inside.”</p><p>Johnny wordlessly accepts Taeyong’s offer as he embraces his friend back and buries his face in his neck, sobs coming out against his will. Taeyong pets his hair, encouraging him to let go of his sadness and whispering words of comfort in his ear. He understands that Johnny is going through a lot of emotions all at once, and that the best kind of comfort he can offer is a good hug and tell him it’ll be okay.</p><p>It takes Johnny a lot of time to calm down, and by the time most of his tears have dried, Taeyong fetched some tissues to clean his face.</p><p>“I’m gonna go make some hot chocolate real quick,” Taeyong tells him before hurrying out of the room.</p><p>Johnny sniffles, and hugs his knees to his chest. Crying did help, and so did talking with Taeyong. Thinking about it, he guesses that the best to do would be mentally preparing himself to giving up on Jaehyun, as much as he doesn’t want to. From the moment Jaehyun first told him of his crush on Doyoung years ago, he should’ve given up, he tells himself, breaking his heart more.</p><p>“They’re probably going to start dating soon, right?” Johnny tells Taeyong when the latter comes back with two hot mugs.</p><p>“Doyoung and Jaehyun? I guess so,” Taeyong replies, frowning sadly, “it’s going to be so hard for you, I wish I could do something.”</p><p>Johnny shrugs, and accepts the mug Taeyong hands him.</p><p>“Why did I keep hoping I’d have a chance with him?” Johnny asks.</p><p>Taeyong takes his hand and squeezes it.</p><p>“I don’t think you can help it, I was the same with Doyoung even after he’d told me about his feelings for Jaehyun. It took me all of my willpower to accept that it’d always be one-sided.”</p><p>“I hate that it hurts and that I can’t simply accept that it’s not meant to be,” Johnny says, getting angry at himself.</p><p>Taeyong caresses his arm, gently.</p><p>“Be nice to yourself, it’s not your fault.”</p><p>Johnny sighs, and nods, defeated. Taeyong takes a sip of his chocolate, and suddenly goes “oh.”</p><p>“Wait. Does that mean that Jaehyun asked you to make sure Doyoung also likes him?”</p><p>“He didn’t,” Johnny answers, “I offered.”</p><p>“Why?” Taeyong inquires, not getting it.</p><p>Johnny scratches his head.</p><p>“He talks about Doyoung so often and I get hurt every time,” he starts, slowly, “and I know I’ll feel worse when they’ll finally be together because he’ll probably tell me about what he does with Doyoung and it’ll make me feel like shit seeing them together... but at least, I’ll know for sure that there’s no more hope for me. I had a feeling Doyoung liked him too, so now I can tell him about it and they can get their shit together.”</p><p>Taeyong sighs.</p><p>“I understand where you’re coming from. This sucks so much, I really don’t know how to help you.”</p><p>“You already did a lot,” Johnny smiles sincerely, “I hadn’t told anyone yet, so I’m feeling a lot better having told you.”</p><p>Taeyong reciprocates his smile.</p><p>“Was that when you fell in love with Kun?” Johnny suddenly asks, “when you were feeling sad about Doyoung?”</p><p>“Kind of,” Taeyong says, scratching his head, “I mean I had already been sad for a while and I don’t know how come we started spending more time together. He’s the one who started flirting though and it took me some time to understand that, but at some point, I thought “why not” and I fell really hard.”</p><p>Johnny smiles.</p><p>“It’s good that you had a happy ending.”</p><p>Taeyong nods, grinning.</p><p>“Falling in love with someone else can do the trick to get over unrequited feelings,” he agrees, “I don’t know if that’s always the good solution, but for me it worked out just fine. Now I know I wouldn’t trade what I have with Kun for anything else in the world.”</p><p>“That actually gives me hope,” Johnny admits, “thank you.”</p><p>“All I can tell you is that I hope you’ll be fine,” Taeyong concludes, “if you need to talk me more about that or anything else, I’m always here. We can plan to go out to change your mind too, it’s good to keep your mind busy with positive stuff.”</p><p>“Thank you Tae, I really appreciate it.”</p><p>“How about we start by watching a movie?”</p><p>Johnny smiles brightly at that, and Taeyong giggles.</p>
<hr/><p>As expected, Jaehyun wants to throw up. The hardest part wasn’t even asking Doyoung out on a date, to be honest, but it is actually sitting through the date when he’s feeling so anxious. Jaehyun didn’t precise it was a date, merely asked Doyoung if he wanted to grab some coffee and pastries and enjoy some quiet time, but it is a date and Jaehyun has a feeling he’s not going to make it out alive. Being in love makes him sick, which is both worrying and terrifying.</p><p>In front of him, Doyoung is munching on a slice of chocolate cake, looks adorable and not stressed at all. They’ve been talking about various things such as practice, upcoming concerts and also things they enjoy outside of their idols duties such as movies and music. Jaehyun loves conversing with Doyoung because he’s a very expressive person. He’s talkative, but in a good way, and he’s funny, which makes Jaeyun’s insides all mushy. He could spend hours listening and watching him talk, lovestruck.</p><p>But now’s not the time to hesitate more, Jaehyun tells himself. There’s a reason he picked a coffee shop date to ask Doyoung out, and he needs to take advantage of it; he knows it’d be Doyoung’s favorite spot for a first date, and he’s been praying this will help with his confession, somehow.</p><p>“Is it good?” Jaehyun asks, seeing as Doyoung is closing his eyes, smiling as he’s savoring his cake.</p><p>Doyoung swallows before answering.</p><p>“It’s delicious,” he moans, making Jaehyun blush, “here,” he adds, scooping some cake on his spoon and offering it to Jaehyun.</p><p>Jaehyun hesitantly wraps his lips around the spoon and takes the piece of cake in his mouth, under Doyoung’s satisfied gaze. He munches and swallows, and nods.</p><p>“It’s really good,” he agrees, and Doyoung grins. “Say, Doyoung, can I tell you something?” Jaehyun finally says, and he can feel sweat creeping on his neck and his back.</p><p>“Sure,” Doyoung smiles, “what is it?”</p><p>“I’m in love with you,” Jaehyun blurts out, proud he didn’t stutter, but he suddenly feels sicker than before. His chest feels tight, and he looks down on his coffee, realizing he can’t bring himself to meet Doyoung’s eyes. He opens his mouth to add something, but the words don’t come out.</p><p>Unexpectedly, there are sudden tears burning his eyes, and he’s mortified to have started crying right after confessing. But it’s like he’s lost control over his body, for more tears roll on his cheeks and he has trouble breathing. He manages to cover his eyes, and he bites his lower lip hard enough to draw blood to prevent any sobs to come out. Shame and embarrassment are slowly overcoming him, and he wants to disappear so badly.</p><p>Why are you crying, stupid, Jaehyun tells himself, stupid, stupid, stupid-</p><p>“Jaehyun,” Doyoung suddenly calls out from his side, and Jaehyun freezes as arms wrap around his shoulders, bringing him into a warm embrace. “Don’t cry, I love you too so please don’t cry,” Doyoung adds, quickly.</p><p>Jaehyun’s overwhelmed by relief at his crush’s words, but his tears refuse to stop this easily. He removes his hands from his face to bury his face in Doyoung’s neck because he refuses to let Doyoung see him ugly crying, and he hugs his waist tightly.</p><p>“Shh, calm down baby,” Doyoung whispers in his ear, and Jaehyun’s heart misses a beat at the petname. He whines, and lets Doyoung caress his hair gently, refusing to come out.</p><p>“You can stay here, I don’t mind,” Doyoung adds after a few minutes of cuddling, “it’s nice having you in my arms.”</p><p>“Stop flirting,” Jaehyun protests.</p><p>“I’m trying to make you laugh rather than cry,” Doyoung says, pressing a short kiss to Jaehyun’s exposed neck, and Jaehyun yelps.</p><p>They break away and Jaehyun is as red as a strawberry. Just because they’re in a private booth doesn’t mean they should be this careless, he realizes.</p><p>“Uh, how about going back to the dorms?” Jaehyun suggests.</p><p>“We should,” Doyoung agrees, and at least he’s also pink in the face.</p><p> </p><p>They’re careful as they make their way back to the NCT dorms, and Jaehyun feels less nervous about being near Doyoung. If anything, excitement is replacing his earlier nervousness, and he can’t stop glancing at his (hopefully) boyfriend. When they finally close the door behind them, Doyoung sighs in relief.</p><p>“I’ll shower real quick, then how about spending some time in my room?”</p><p>Jaehyun nods too hastily, making Doyoung laugh. Doyoung tip toes and kisses his cheek before departing for the bathroom, leaving a red-faced Jaehyun behind him.</p><p>Jaehyun quickly snaps out of it and figures he might as well go shower too. He drops by his room to get clean clothes, and locks himself in the second bathroom of the dorms to spend time cleaning himself. He washes his hair while he’s at it, and when he exits the bathroom wearing comfortable clothes, he’s still drying his hair with a towel. He waves at the members he meets on his way to Doyoung’s room, and he knocks on the door, gulping down with excitement.</p><p>Doyoung gets the door, and Jaehyun smiles nervously as he enters. Doyoung locks the door behind him, and they go sit on his bed, side by side.</p><p>“Oh no your hair’s still wet, that’s so cute,” Doyoung notices out loud, and Jaehyun gets all pink as Doyoung resumes drying his hair gently. “There you go,” he says, discarding the towel on a chair.</p><p>He turns back towards Jaehyun and plays with his hair, making Jaehyun all mushy on the inside. Doyoung gets closer, and for a second Jaehyun thinks they’re going to kiss – but Doyoung merely kisses his forehead.</p><p>“You look adorable,” Doyoung tells him, and Jaehyun shifts uncomfortably.</p><p>He’s happy with all the attention but he’s also nervous, like he’s about to explode from receiving too much love.</p><p>“Are we dating now?” Jaehyun blurts out, making Doyoung tilt his head in visible confusion.</p><p>“Yes? I mean, we like each other, so…?”</p><p>Jaehyun shifts again, and Doyoung suddenly grins understandingly.</p><p>“Oh, you wanna do this officially?”</p><p>Before Jaehyun can answer, Doyoung fakes clearing his throat and speaks up again.</p><p>“Will you be my boyfriend?”</p><p>He’s grinning so widely Jaehyun feels slightly blinded, and he nods.</p><p>“Yes please,” he answers, making Doyoung giggle.</p><p>“Why do you look like a sad puppy? Aren’t you happy?” Doyoung asks, pinching Jaehyun’s cheeks.</p><p>Jaehyun lets his boyfriend have fun with his face, and sighs.</p><p>“I’m afraid this is all a dream,” he answers, “I’ve already dreamed of moments like this and when I woke up it was all gone… and now that it feels real I don’t want it to be just a fantasy.”</p><p>“Would it help if I kissed you?” Doyoung asks, getting closer.</p><p>“But we’ve already kissed in my dreams,” Jaehyun protests, “and yet you were still gone after-”</p><p>“Oh no, this time I’ll show you what a real kiss feels like,” Doyoung counters before cupping Jaehyun’s face in his hands and pressing their mouths together.</p><p>Jaehyun’s indeed dreamed of kissing Doyoung so many times he could imagine what it would feel like, and the reality is pretty close to his fantasies. Doyoung’s mouth is pretty, and his lips have a sorta sweet taste which makes the kiss all the more special. Jaehyun answers the kiss, moving his lips against Doyoung’s slowly, and he feels himself blushing as Doyoung pushes his tongue in his mouth. Jaehyun parts his lips at that, and his own tongue finally meets Doyoung’s for the first time.</p><p>It’s just a regular kiss, but it’s with Doyoung, his Doyoung.</p><p>Fuck, we’re really kissing, Jaehyun realizes. It’s starting to feel more real than any of his previous dreams, and Doyoung’s hands on his neck and waist are also definitely helping him accepting that this is reality. They break away to breathe, and Doyoung whines.</p><p>“I’m nowhere near satisfied,” he says, and Jaehyun’s skin is tingling where Doyoung is touching him.</p><p>Jaehyun doesn’t know what to answer, but he feels the same. He hesitates, but pecks Doyoung’s lips quickly.</p><p>“Maybe we could, uh, lie on the bed or something?” he suggests, and Doyoung nods.</p><p>“I hope you won’t mind but I can tell I’m growing needy,” Doyoung lets him know as Jaehyun lies on his back, feeling excited to be on Doyoung’s bed.</p><p>“It’s fine,” Jaehyun answers, but he sounds strangled.</p><p>It takes Doyoung just a few seconds to get on top of him and initiate a passionate kiss, making Jaehyun light-headed. He doesn’t know where to put his hands because there are too many possibilities, but he also doesn’t want to overdo it; he’s not quite sure what their respective boundaries are. Now’s the time to find out, he figures. Doyoung’s too busy devouring his mouth, and it makes Jaehyun happy to feel so desired. It’s so pleasant to feel the foreign weight of Doyoung’s body on his, and he’s getting addicted to Doyoung’s kissing skills.</p><p>“Doyoung?” Jaehyun calls out as they’re breathing heavily from too much kissing.</p><p>“Hm?” Doyoung answers, still laying kisses all over Jaehyun’s face.</p><p>“Where is it okay to touch you?”</p><p>Doyoung stops at that, tilting his head in confusion.</p><p>“Sorry, what?”</p><p>Jaehyun blushes, and looks away, his hands leaving Doyoung’s waist to fall back on the crumpled sheets.</p><p>“I mean, if there’s anywhere you don’t want to be touched, just, uh, let me know?”</p><p>Doyoung waits a few seconds, and kisses his cheek gently.</p><p>“There’s nowhere I don’t want you to touch me,” he answers, “give me your best cuddles,” he adds, grinning.</p><p>“Are you sure?” Jaehyun asks, eyebrows dropping, “I-”</p><p>“Absolutely,” Doyoung cuts him off, “if I don’t feel comfortable with something I’ll tell you.”</p><p>Jaehyun nods.</p><p>“Good,” Doyoung smiles, “you know you can also tell me if anything is too much, right?”</p><p>Jaehyun nods once more, having trouble not staring at his boyfriend like the lovestruck fool that he is. Doyoung never loses his smile and kisses him lovingly, taking time to lick at his lips and tilting his head for a better kissing angle. Jaehyun lets him do as he pleases, shivering in pleasure as Doyoung kisses him with too much tongue.</p><p>Kissing Doyoung is his new favorite activity, Jaehyun thinks as he caresses his boyfriend’s back with one hand, the other going further south and hovering above Doyoung’s ass. Doyoung did give him permission to touch him wherever he wanted, so he figures he can touch him more intimately. Jaehyun, still busy answering Doyoung’s lascivious kisses, slowly moves his hand so as to cup his lover’s buttcheeks gently. Doyoung’s reaction is immediate, for his hips suddenly thrust against Jaehyun’s, making both of them moan in surprise.</p><p>“I was expecting this but I don’t know why I’m so sensitive to your touch,” Doyoung says, laughing with embarrassment.</p><p>He hides his face in Jaehyun’s neck, still shaken with giggles, and Jaehyun feels so much love for him.</p><p>“Maybe I should stick to hugging your waist for now,” Jaehyun suggests, grinning.</p><p>“But I like it when you touch my ass, I’m just sensitive,” Doyoung defends himself, and they both start laughing at the ridiculousness of their exchange.</p><p>“Careful, I’m gonna touch you again,” Jaehyun finally says, a little breathless.</p><p>“Hm-hm,” Doyoung smiles in his neck. “God, that feels so nice,” he comments aloud when Jaehyun puts both his hands on his butt, squeezing it slightly. “Can I, then…?” he adds, pushing Jaehyun’s sweater and tee-shirt up, revealing Jaehyun’s stomach.</p><p>“Of course,” Jaehyun answers, and he can’t help but tense as Doyoung starts caressing him. He suddenly understands his boyfriend’s sensitiveness from earlier. Doyoung’s hands on his body feel a little too nice, and he doesn’t know how far Doyoung planning on touching him but he’s loving it.</p><p>“Okay, this feels amazing, but maybe we should stop here,” Doyoung says suddenly, and Jaehyun snaps back to reality.</p><p>He looks at Doyoung in confusion, and Doyoung smiles gently.</p><p>“I don’t know if it’s a good idea to go too far, considering we just started dating,” he elaborates.</p><p>“Oh.”</p><p>“Not that I don’t love you, baby,” Doyoung says, nuzzling his nose against his face, “because I do, so much, but I don’t know if you feel ready for more so early.”</p><p>Jaehyun looks away, suddenly feeling shy.</p><p>“You’ve had a lot of emotions for today, and I can tell you’re still all tense, so let’s take it slowly?”</p><p>“You’re right,” Jaehyun agrees, getting redder.</p><p>It’s definitely better to stop before any of them gets too aroused and things get awkward. Doyoung kisses his cheek repeatedly, and sighs happily. Jaehyun hugs him tightly, and Doyoung makes another happy noise.</p><p>“Did that feel good for you too?” Doyoung makes sure, kissing Jaehyun’s ear as he asks his question.</p><p>“Yes, of course,” Jaehyun answers, “I still have trouble believing that it’s real.”</p><p>“It’s very much real,” Doyoung laughs, “we’re boyfriends.”</p><p>Doyoung is my boyfriend, Jaehyun’s inner self cries in hapiness, I probably saved a country in my past life to get such a successful fate in this life. Jaehyun also thinks he’s probably very tired from his day, because the only thoughts in his head are “Doyoung” and “boyfriend”. He wonders if it’s obvious he’s just vibrating with endless love for his lover.</p><p>“Maybe we should keep it to ourselves for now?”</p><p>“Huh?” Jaehyun says, dumbly.</p><p>“I mean,” Doyoung shifts, “maybe we should wait a little before announcing our relationship?”</p><p>“Oh, you’re right, it’s not like we’re in a hurry,” Jaehyun agrees.</p><p>The thought of telling the group about them dating warms his chest with unlimited fondness for Doyoung. He pictures them holding hands and him proudly introducing Doyoung as his boyfriend, smiling so hard his jaw would hurt. He imagines the reactions of the other members, and can’t help but wonder who will congratulate them.</p><p>“Why are you smiling like this?” Doyoung asks, caressing his face. “You look like you’re imagining something very nice.”</p><p>Jaehyun opens his mouth to answer but Doyoung covers his lips with a finger, shushing him.</p><p>“Could it be that you’re thinking about me?” he asks, and Jaehyun blushes. “Even if I’m right here?” he teases.</p><p>Jaehyun presses a kiss to Doyoung’s finger, and removes his boyfriend’s hand to answer.</p><p>“I was thinking about you but-- hold on, wait before laughing at me!” Jaehyun protests, sensing that Doyoung is about to make another remark, “I was thinking of the moment we’ll tell everyone we’re dating and it made me happy to realize that I’ll be able to call you my boyfriend openly.”</p><p>“Aww baby, you really are the cutest!” Doyoung exclaims, giggling. “I hope you’re fully prepared for what it implies to be my boyfriend,” he adds, and Jaehyun gulps down worriedly.</p><p>“What does it imply?” he asks, unsure of what Doyoung means.</p><p>“You’ll get lots of hugs and kisses,” Doyoung grins devilishly, “and I’ll call you by petnames rather than by your name most of the time, too,” he resumes, “I’m not the kind of discreet boyfriend whose presence goes unnoticed, I need attention.”</p><p>“Oh, I don’t… I don’t mind any of that,” Jaehyun stutters, “that sounds, uh, good even?”</p><p>“Awesome then,” Doyoung giggles, “I won’t let you go.”</p><p>“Okay, stop flirting though because my heart is really weak,” Jaehyun protests, “I can’t get used to that.”</p><p>Doyoung goes “oh!!” as if Jaehyun had told him his biggest secret.</p><p>“So your weakness is your boyfriend flirting with you,” Doyoung articulates slowly, “hmm?”</p><p>“Stop looking at me like that,” Jaehyun says, closing his eyes.</p><p>Doyoung moves on top of him and Jaehyun can tell he’s staring at him. Jaehyun refuses to look at him, stubborn, and Doyoung laughs against his lips.</p><p>“Look at you being adorable,” Doyoung teases some more, punctuating his sentence by a kiss, “you’re the sweetest,” another kiss, “the cutest”, one more kiss, “my favorite baby,” a final kiss, making Jaehyun briefly forgetting about breathing.</p><p>“Stop, I’m gonna pass out,” Jaehyun moans, finally looking at Doyoung through glassy eyes.</p><p>Doyoung snorts, and sits up, getting off Jaehyun. Jaehyun takes a deep breath before sitting up as well. He shares a knowing look with Doyoung, and they smile at each other. Despite the position being a little awkward, Jaehyun pulls Doyoung into a hug.</p><p>“I love you,” Jaehyun confesses, squeezing his boyfriend in his arms.</p><p>“I love you too babe,” Doyoung answers, “I love you a lot.”</p><p>They remain hugging for a few minutes, until Jaehyun breaks their embrace and gets up.</p><p>“As much as I want to spend the night here, I think it’s more reasonable to sleep in my own room for now,” he sighs.</p><p>Doyoung laughs and gets up so as to pull him into a last hug.</p><p>“We have all the time in the world love, soon I’m sure we’ll be spending a lot of time together so don’t worry.”</p><p>Jaehyun buries his face in Doyoung’s shoulder, trying to make himself smaller in his arms.</p><p>“Let’s have dinner together, Jaehyunnie?” Doyoung offers, kissing his ear.</p><p>“Hm-hm,” Jaehyun nods.</p><p>Dinner goes smoothly, with each of them trying hard not to be too close, but Jaehyun thinks he’s failing at not looking too whipped. After brushing their teeth, it’s time to go to bed, so they only share a few discreet kisses before parting. Once he’s in his bed, Jaehyun does various things on his phone for a while, and ponders about texting Doyoung, even if they already told each other good night.</p><p>He figures a short message won’t hurt, and sends “Good night Doyoung, I love you so much ♡”. He’s still smiling at his phone when he gets an answer, which reads “Sweet dreams my Jaehyunnie, I love you more ♡”. Jaehyun reads the words over and over, his smile getting bigger and bigger as he realizes that this is a hundred percent real.</p><p>Doyoung really called him “my Jaehyunnie” – and the thought of Doyoung thinking of him as his makes his heart race – and answered his “I love you” by the same three words. Jaehyun brings his phone to his heart, and bites his lower lip as the brightest smile he’s ever had spreads on his face: this is the happiest day of his life.</p><p>“Oh, Doyoung, you have no idea how much I love you,” Jaehyun whispers to himself, his thoughts focused on nothing but his boyfriend.</p><p>He can’t help but send another text, too giddy.</p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>♡ My Jaehyunnie ♡</strong>
</p><p>I can’t stop thinking about you, today was marvelous ♡ ♡</p><p>I wanna see you in my dreams</p><p>I miss you so bad ♡</p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>Doyoungie ♡</strong>
</p><p>Baby ♡ ♡ ♡</p><p>You haven’t left my mind since we came back home, not even once</p><p>I didn’t think I could think of you more than I already did</p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>♡ My Jaehyunnie ♡</strong>
</p><p>♡ ♡ ♡</p><p>I love you</p><p>I’m sorry if I say it too much I really mean it</p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>Doyoungie ♡</strong>
</p><p>No worries, there’s no such thing as saying it too much!</p><p>I’ll go to sleep for real this time baby</p><p>I love you lots sweetheart ♡ ♡ ♡</p><p>Can’t wait for tomorrow to see you again ♡ ♡</p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>♡ My Jaehyunnie ♡</strong>
</p><p>Rest well!!</p><p>Love love love love you ♡ ♡ ♡</p>
<hr/><p>It’s been a while since Jaehyun last woke up with a smile on his face. As soon as his phone rings with his morning alarm, he stops it, swiping across the touchscreen a little too strongly. He lays his arm on his eyes, shielding them from the morning light, and his smile gets bigger as Doyoung pops up in his mind.</p><p>Doyoung, my boyfriend, Jaehyun thinks to himself before giggling. He grabs his phone and checks the time; he still has time to wash up and have breakfast before their first schedule of the day, so he’ll try to get ready quickly so he can enjoy maybe a few minutes with Doyoung. He hesitates, but sends him a “good morning sunshine ♡ hope you slept well! see you ♡”.</p><p>He gets up from his bed and heads for the bathroom to shower, and when he comes out, he smiles brightly as he sees Doyoung already dressed and having breakfast. Not wanting to bring too much attention to any of them, Jaehyun merely brushes Doyoung’s shoulders with his fingers as he walks past him before sitting in front of him. Doyoung greets him with a reciprocal smile, and they eat while making small talk. Some other members are also talking, while the less awake ones are struggling to even open their eyes.</p><p>After brushing their teeth, Doyoung and Jaehyun find themselves in Jaehyun’s room. Jaehyun giggles as he closes the door behind them, and he makes a happy noise as Doyoung hugs him.</p><p>“I missed you,” Jaehyun tells his boyfriend, hugging him back tightly.</p><p>“Me too, and I didn’t even dream of you,” Doyoung answers, pouting.</p><p>Jaehyun melts, and bends down to kiss him. Doyoung kisses him back with a lot of enthusiasm for someone who’s been awake for less than an hour, and Jaehyun wonders what the others would tell seeing them French kissing at barely 8am. They would probably be disgusted, which Jaehyun guesses is fair because he wouldn’t like to see anyone kissing like that so early in the morning either – but since he’s the one doing the kissing, he doesn’t mind as much.</p><p>“Hmm, I love getting my Jaehyun needs filled up like this,” Doyoung smiles as they break away.</p><p>“Jaehyun needs?” Jaehyun repeats, laughing, “what’s that?”</p><p>“It’s how much of your presence I need daily,” Doyoung elaborates, “so while we weren’t dating, just seeing you and talking to you every day was enough, but now that you’re my boyfriend…”</p><p>Jaehyun waits, biting his lower lip as he tries to hold back a huge, dumb smile.</p><p>“I’m probably gonna need hugs, kisses, and spending time holding you just to make sure that you’re not going anywhere,” Doyoung concludes with a satisfied smile, which Jaehyun reciprocates.</p><p>“Why would I go somewhere you aren’t?” Jaehyun asks, caressing Doyoung’s cheeks, “I’m gonna stick by your side so much you’ll grow tired of me,” he teases.</p><p>“We just began dating, I’m not tired of seeing your pretty face yet,” Doyoung replies, and he leans in to kiss Jaehyun again.</p><p>As the kiss grows more passionate and their hug tighter, there’s a knock on Jaehyun’s door.</p><p>“Jaehyun, we’re leaving in five minutes!” Taeyong’s voice resonates loudly.</p><p>“Gotcha, thanks!” Jaehyun answers, a little breathless.</p><p>Doyoung buries his face in his chest, and Jaehyun embraces him.</p><p>“Okay, now’s the time to stop acting like boyfriends,” Doyoung sighs, like he’s really regretting having to play pretend, and Jaehyun feels relieved that he’s not the only one feeling like this.</p><p>“It’ll be fine, we just have to act as usual,” Jaehyun says, but he has a hunch it could be difficult.</p><p>“Don’t hold it against me if I’m distant, I’m afraid that if I spend too much time with you my eyes will betray my feelings for you,” Doyoung confesses, looking down, and Jaehyun’s heart misses a beat.</p><p>“It’s fine,” Jaehyun nods, “I’ll also try my best not to look too lovestruck if I’m next to you.”</p><p>They share a smile, and a last, slow kiss.</p><p>“I love you babe,” Doyoung whispers.</p><p>“Love you too,” Jaehyun grins.</p><p> </p><p>The day seems unbelievably slow to Jaehyun, but at least, he’s proud to keep his interactions with Doyoung to a minimum. They talk from time to time, but not more than necessary, and instead Jaehyun spends time with Johnny. Because they have schedules in public, it’s not like they can talk about Jaehyun’s new relationship with Doyoung, but Jaehyun thinks that if anyone should know about it first, it’s Johnny, who did so much for him.</p><p>At last they’re back to the dorms, and Jaehyun takes advantage of Doyoung showering to drop by Johnny’s room. After knocking on the door and Johnny telling him to come in, Jaehyun does so quietly. His best friend is laying on his bed, visibly resting before dinner.</p><p>“Hey, how are you feeling?” Jaehyun asks, sitting on the mattress.</p><p>“Just a bit tired,” Johnny replies.</p><p>Jaehyun smiles before laying on top of Johnny in a somewhat awkward position, pulling him into a hug. Johnny shifts so he can hug him back.</p><p>“You got something to tell me?” Johnny asks.</p><p>Jaehyun giggles, found out.</p><p>“I do.”</p><p>“I don’t even have to think too hard to guess,” Johnny jokes, “but c’mon, spill.”</p><p>“I’m going out with Doyoung,” Jaehyun confesses, blushing.</p><p>“Did Jaehyunnie get himself a boyfriend?” Johnny asks, teasing, “lucky you!”</p><p>“Can you believe it?” Jaehyun fake sobs, “my dream came true.”</p><p>“You deserve it,” Johnny tells him, squeezing Jaehyun tightly in his muscled arms. “So, how’s it like dating him?”</p><p>“It’s barely been a day,” Jaehyun says, “I confessed while on our coffee date yesterday and then we spent some time in his room. We… uh, kissed and stuff, and it was even more amazing than in my dreams.”</p><p>“Don’t forget to use protection ~” Johnny sing-songs, and Jaehyun hits his chest.</p><p>“We didn’t… oh my God, we’re not gonna have--anyway, shut it!”</p><p>At that, Jaehyun sits up, all red in the face, and Johnny sends him a shit-eating grin.</p><p>“C’mon, we both know you’re not as innocent as you like to pretend. It’s okay if you wanna have sex with Doyoung, who’s gonna judge?”</p><p>“Shut up, this is embarrassing,” Jaehyun shakes his head, getting up.</p><p>“I’m just playing with you,” Johnny smiles, “go see your boyfriend and forget about me.”</p><p>Jaehyun rolls his eyes at Johnny’s dramatic tone, and comes back to him to hug him tightly.</p><p>“Don’t say that, I love you and you’re so important to me. I’m never gonna stop spending time with you just because I got a boyfriend.”</p><p>Johnny forces a laughter, and Jaehyun shakes his head hearing the falseness in his voice.</p><p>“I’m serious,” Jaehyun frowns, “I mean, because it’s just the beginning I’m probably gonna spend more time with Doyoung but soon I promise I’ll definitely have some time for you.”</p><p>“I won’t hold it against you if you want to spend more time with Doyoung, I understand why it’s important to you,” Johnny argues, but Jaehyun shakes his head once more.</p><p>“C’mon, it’s not the same being with you and being with him. I need both of you in my life.”</p><p>Jaehyun wonders why Johnny looks about to tell him something before deciding against it.</p><p>“Is there something wrong?” Jaehyun tilts his head, and Johnny smiles.</p><p>“Nope, all’s good. Go now, I’m gonna catch some sleep before dinner.”</p><p>“Okay,” Jaehyun smiles back, “rest well, I’ll catch you later.”</p><p> </p><p>After a last hug, Jaehyun heads for his own room, and gasps when he sees Doyoung already sitting on his bed. Doyoung smiles, and Jaehyun hurries, locking his door and throwing himself on his boyfriend, whose back hits the mattress. Doyoung barely has time to settle more comfortably that Jaehyun presses their mouths in a passionate kiss, moaning without holding back.</p><p>“I missed you,” Jaehyun whines, nuzzling their noses together.</p><p>“You’re so cute I’m gonna cry,” Doyoung laughs, but Jaehyun call hear the fondness in his voice.</p><p>They look at each other for a few seconds, and Jaehyun is taken aback by how much love he can see in Doyoung’s sparkly eyes. Jaehyun immediately kisses him again, and Doyoung brings him closer as they start making out.</p><p>“I think we need to establish a routine to make use of what little time we can spend together each day,” Jaehyun says as they settle in a more comfortable position to keep hugging, “like, in the morning and at night,” he elaborates.</p><p>“We should,” Doyoung agrees, “I think that we did today was pretty good? And I think we did a good job at hiding our relationship throughout the day.”</p><p>“Yes,” Jaehyun smiles, “we didn’t interact too much, and we were discreet. Now we’ll have to be careful for our dates too,” he sighs, resting his head on Doyoung’s chest.</p><p>“Speaking of dates, I know exactly what kind of date I want to do with you next time,” Doyoung says.</p><p>Jaehyun perks up at that.</p><p>“Tell me!” he asks in a cute voice.</p><p>Doyoung laughs at that.</p><p>“A date here at home,” Doyoung answers, “I want to cook dinner for you and then we could watch a movie.”</p><p>“Oh, that sounds so good!” Jaehyun exclaims with enthusiasm, “when should we do that?”</p><p>“I’m pretty sure we have next Sunday off so how about Saturday night? It’ll be our one-week anniversary then.” Doyoung offers.</p><p>“I’m in,” Jaehyun smiles, “I’d like to pick up some wine, then. Oh, and I’ll take care of the dessert as well!”</p><p>“Perfect,” Doyoung smiles back, “now it’s cuddle time,” he declares.</p>
<hr/><p>Jaehyun is honestly surprised by how fast their first week as a couple goes by. He guesses that the fact that they both have a lot of work has to do with it, because while they do see each other every day, it’s also hard to make more time than an hour or two to be together. They’ve picked up the habit of sharing a few kisses in the morning before they have to leave for their schedules, and of spending some time chatting and cuddling before bed time. It’s nowhere near enough, but they don’t exactly have a choice.</p><p>That said, tonight is finally the evening of their date and they don’t work tomorrow meaning they’ll even be able to sleep in the same room – which they haven’t tried yet. The bed would be big enough for them if they cuddle, but they’re both aware that they’d chat and make out instead of getting some much needed rest.</p><p>After showering, Jaehyun changes into nicer clothes than his usual sweater and sweatpants: he settles for a pair of black pants that show off his legs and a white shirt with silver patterns. He even adds a few more earrings to his ears and styles his hair a bit. Even if they’re going to stay in, a date is a date, and he wants to look good for Doyoung.</p><p>It seems that his boyfriend had the same idea, Jaehyun realizes when they meet in the kitchen where Doyoung is already cooking. Doyoung went for black pants as well, and a baby blue shirt that fits his broad shoulders so nicely Jaehyun could start drooling. The nicest point of his boyfriend’s outfit is that his shirt is slightly opened on his chest, and Jaehyun can see his collarbones, on which sit a thin necklace.</p><p>They check each other out and laugh, then Jaehyun pulls Doyoung in back-hug for a few seconds, appreciating how Doyoung fits in his arms so well. Doyoung turns around to peck his lips, and he goes back to cooking.</p><p>“Bibimbap?” Jaehyun asks as Doyoung carefully serves the food into two big bowls.</p><p>“Yup,” Doyoung nods, “you like it, right?” he suddenly makes sure, looking up at Jaehyun who smiles.</p><p>“Of course!”</p><p>Doyoung reciprocates his happy grin.</p><p>“Did you really get us wine?” Doyoung asks as he’s cleaning the pans and cooking utensils he used before they can go back to his room.</p><p>“I did,” Jaehyun answers, “oh, and I got dessert too, I should probably move it to the fridge in your room.”</p><p>“Oh, that’s a good idea,” Doyoung nods, “we’ll probably have to make one or two trips to move everything to my room anyway.”</p><p>Jaehyun gets started, taking the bowls to the folding table in Doyoung’s room. He comes back to the kitchen to get them chopsticks and glasses, as well as plates for the dessert and spoons. He gets the dessert and the wine to put them into Doyoung’s fridge, and by the time he closes the fridge’s door, Doyoung comes into the room.</p><p>“Okay, I just got done with washing up the pans so that’s one less thing to wash afterwards.”</p><p>“Awesome, let me wash my hands and I’ll be right back,” Jaehyun replies, pecking Doyoung’s lips as they cross paths.</p><p>When he comes back, Doyoung is already sitting on his bed, and there’s wine in their glasses. Jaehyun locks the door and happily sits down by his side, not resisting pulling him into a hug.</p><p>“I love you,” Jaehyun confesses, and Doyoung kisses his hair.</p><p>“I love you too.”</p><p>Jaehyun asks for a kiss before they start eating, and Doyoung indulges him, making their tongues meet into a sensuous exchange. By the time they pull back, Jaehyun’s already feeling a little aroused, and he wonders how this evening will end. Doyoung kisses him once more, and they finally dig in before the food gets too cold.</p><p>They chat as they enjoy their dinner, and they spend way too much time deciding on a movie – until they both agree on watching the first Pacific Rim film. They start watching it as they’re halfway done with their bibimbap, and when it’s time for dessert, an hour has already gone by. While they focus on the subtitles, they also can’t help but keep talking and making comments, and Jaehyun keeps thinking about how happy he is to get to enjoy Doyoung’s presence in such a special moment.</p><p>They wait for the movie to end to go to the kitchen to wash their used dishes and get rid of the empty wine bottle and dessert box. After a quick pause by the bathroom, they’re back in Doyoung’s room. Doyoung closes his laptop and puts it away while Jaehyun folds the table, and they find themselves sitting on the bed, Jaehyun leaning on the headboard while Doyoung is settled between his legs, back to his torso. Jaehyun is really appreciating feeling the foreign weight against him, and he plays with Doyoung’s hands as they talk.</p><p>“If you got to be in the movie, what kind of character would you like to be?” Jaehyun asks, and Doyoung takes a few seconds to answer, thinking about it.</p><p>“I’d probably like to be a Jaeger pilot? I mean, not that roles like the scientists aren’t important, but I think I’d like to try my hand at being a pilot. You?”</p><p>“Same as you, I’d want to be a pilot. I’d like to be your partner, more specifically,” Jaehyun jokes, making Doyoung giggle.</p><p>He can feel Doyoung shaking as he laughs, and he squeezes him in his arms a little tighter. Doyoung is so precious and Jaehyun feels overwhelmed with love and affection for him.</p><p>“Being partners in this context is like fighting alongside your soulmate, pretty much, I think it’s such a nice concept,” Doyoung comments.</p><p>“I want you to be my soulmate,” Jaehyun says after a few seconds, hugging Doyoung closer to him and resting his chin on his shoulder.</p><p>“And you say that I’m the one flirting too much?” Doyoung teases, “do you hear yourself?”</p><p>Jaehyun whines, making Doyoung laugh.</p><p>“But I can’t say that I don’t like it. I’d love it if we were soulmates,” Doyoung says, making Jaehyun perk up.</p><p>“Do you believe in stuff like fate and soulmates?” he asks, genuinely curious.</p><p>Doyoung shifts.</p><p>“I do?” he replies in a small voice, “I think it’s so nice to think that some things are meant to be, and that there’s someone who’s meant to be the love of your life. It’s kind of magical, and I want that kind of positive feelings in my life.”</p><p>“I wanna be that person for you,” Jaehyun says, sincere, “I really want to be the one for you. I know it’s too early to say if we’re really meant to be, but I hope you know I’m serious about us.”</p><p>“Jaehyunnie,” Doyoung says, obviously moved, “I love you so much!”</p><p>At that, Doyoung turns around so he can kneel between Jaehyun’s legs and hug his shoulders. Jaehyun wastes no time hugging his waist, and for a moment, it’s just them holding each other. Jaehyun gasps as Doyoung initiates a tender kiss, just lips against lips, and his full attention is focused on nothing but Doyoung as he speaks up again.</p><p>“I’m so very thankful that you’re as serious as me about us,” he says, “you mean so much to me, more than I can possibly explain through words. You’re so infinitely precious to me and I really, deeply love you.”</p><p>Jaehyun kisses him back, and Doyoung answers his kiss. Despite the somewhat uncomfortable position, Jaehyun can’t think of anything else than kissing Doyoung.</p><p>“And I love you even more,” Jaehyun finally says as Doyoung is breathing heavily against his mouth.</p><p>“Don’t turn this into a competition,” Doyoung laughs, “you’re gonna lose.”</p><p>“There’s no way I’ll lose when it comes to loving you,” Jaehyun defends himself, smirking, but Doyoung merely laughs again, nuzzling their noses together.</p><p>“Jaehyunnie, speaking of us, I had a thought,” Doyoung says, and Jaehyun shifts so as to sit up again.</p><p>“Yes?”</p><p>Doyoung starts playing with his hair, distracting him, and clears his throat.</p><p>“You know we’re not working tomorrow?”</p><p>“Hm-hm?”</p><p>“Well,” Doyoung resumes, “wouldn’t that be a perfect opportunity to do stuff we usually can’t do?”</p><p>“Like what?” Jaehyun asks, genuinely lost with all of those hints.</p><p>Doyoung laughs, embarrassed, and buries his face in Jaehyun’s neck.</p><p>“C’mon, is it that hard to understand that I wanna have sex with you?” Doyoung sighs in Jaehyun’s ear, and it dooms on Jaehyun.</p><p>“Oh my God, I’m so dumb,” Jaehyun blurts before he can stop himself from doing so.</p><p>Doyoung laughs, this time amused, and he sits between Jaehyun’s legs again, staring at him fondly.</p><p>“You’re not dumb, I was trying to be too subtle,” the elder answers, caressing his hair once more, and Jaehyun blushes. “Of course, that’s only if you want it too. Last time, you were definitely too tense, but I feel like tonight would be perfect?”</p><p>Jaehyun gulps down. He’s feeling both aroused and tense, and he has to try twice before he can answer.</p><p>“That’d be nice,” he says, “but, uh, just so you know, I’m not very… experienced,” he concludes, his voice so low he thinks Doyoung probably didn’t hear him.</p><p>“That’s okay baby,” Doyoung says, playing some more with his hair, “that doesn’t matter, but what matters is if you want it. It’s our first time together, I want it to be a memorable moment for both of us, and not something rushed.”</p><p>“That sounds like my first time,” Jaehyun tries to joke, but he quickly realizes it didn’t come out as something funny when Doyoung frowns, obviously worried. “Uh, don’t worry, I was just too curious about sex and a senior from my high school offered to show me what it was like, and… ahem. It was short and okay but nothing incredible.”</p><p>Doyoung’s frown deepens, if that’s even possible, and Jaehyun can tell he’s pained for him.</p><p>“That doesn’t sound good,” Doyoung says, and his voice is trembling.</p><p>Jaehyun wonders what he did to get a boyfriend who cares about him to the point he’d tear up at him bringing up bittersweet memories. He smiles to reassure Doyoung.</p><p>“Don’t worry,” he repeats, “he didn’t force me into anything and on the contrary, it convinced me that I was definitely gay. I didn’t repeat the experience ever since so that’s why I’m probably lacking a lot. And then, I also fell in love with you when I met you so obviously I didn’t want to try it with anyone else. It’s all good.”</p><p>“I can’t not worry about you when you tell me things like these,” Doyoung finally answers, “but if you assure me that you’re fine, then I’ll try.”</p><p>“How can I not be fine when I have you?” Jaehyun smiles, “c’mon, kiss me.”</p><p>Doyoung does so immediately, and Jaehyun hugs him once more.</p><p>“What about you?” Jaehyun asks, even if he feels like asking about his boyfriend’s exes is a bad move for his heart.</p><p>“Ah,” Doyoung goes, “my first time was also in high school, with a boyfriend I really liked. The few times we did it, it was really nice because he was really caring.”</p><p>Jaehyun forces a smile, but as he expected, he feels jealous.</p><p>“That sounds nice,” he comments, not meaning it.</p><p>Doyoung probably senses he’s uncomfortable, and he immediately resumes talking.</p><p>“But we broke up anyway because we had different goals in life. And you don’t have to be jealous, it was a long time ago and ever since I fell in love with you too. You’re way more handsome than he was, and you understand me better than he ever did. In conclusion: you’re my ideal type and a perfect boyfriend.”</p><p>Jaehyun’s jealousy melts instantly at Doyoung’s last words, and he buries his face in his hands, cheeks burning.</p><p>“No one can compare to you, Jaehyunnie,” Doyoung adds, and Jaehyun whines.</p><p>“Okay, stop, I got it, I’m not jealous anymore,” he blabbers.</p><p>“Now it’s only about you and me,” Doyoung adds once more, softly, and Jaehyun thinks he’s turned into a puddle at this point.</p><p>It takes him some time to calm down, but when he does Doyoung immediately attacks him with kisses. They resume making out, Doyoug eventually laying on top of Jaehyun, and Jaehyun starts feeling a little too nice for his liking.</p><p>“Doyoung?” Jaehyun calls out as they’re panting, taking a break from kissing.</p><p>“Yes baby?”</p><p>“If we’re gonna have sex, do you have, uh, the stuff like condoms and lube?”</p><p>“Of course,” Doyoung nods, “I bought some.”</p><p>Jaehyun flushes, and Doyoung giggles.</p><p>“We’re not even doing anything and yet you’re already so red, it’s so cute,” Doyoung comments, visibly having fun seeing how timid Jaehyun suddenly got.</p><p>“How am I not supposed to be embarrassed? How do you do it?” Jaehyun shoots back, frowning cutely.</p><p>“I’m feeling anxious too, but in a good way because I’ve been waiting for this moment for a long time. So now that it’s happening for real, I’m feeling so incredibly happy,” Doyoung answers.</p><p>Jaehyun’s heart misses a beat. Doyoung has been wanting for them to be together for so long, just like him, and the same feelings of glee and wonder are filling him. Doyoung is right, this is the perfect setting for their first time.</p><p>“Maybe we could, um, take off a few stuff then?” Jaehyun offers, noticing that they’ve been making out completely clothed this entire time.</p><p>“Do you feel ready?” Doyoung makes sure, caressing Jaehyun’s sides slowly.</p><p>“Yes,” Jaehyun nods, “still nervous but I trust you.”</p><p>“I trust you too,” Doyoung smiles.</p><p>There’s a pause as Doyoung gets off the bed to get rid of his pants. Jaehyun imitates him, and he bites his lower lip as Doyoung takes off his shirt while he’s at it. Doyoung’s back is nice, from his broad shoulders to his slim waist, and Jaehyun can’t wait to feel his skin against his own. As soon as he’s done discarding his shirt, Doyoung turns to Jaehyun with a teasing smile.</p><p>“Need help with yours?” he asks, tugging at the hems of Jaehyun’s top.</p><p>“I’ll be fine,” is Jaehyun’s flustered answer.</p><p>He takes a deep breath and takes off the piece of clothing. Doyoung takes it from his hands to lay it on top of his own shirt already on a chair, and Jaehyun decides he’s taken off enough for now. He lays back on Doyoung’s bed, and Doyoung comes and settles between his legs.</p><p>“I already knew how gorgeous you are, but seeing it from so close is really incredible,” Doyoung says, his eyes trailing up and down Jaehyun’s torso. Jaehyun resists covering his chest with his arms, despite his embarrassment, and reminds himself that this is fine. Doyoung’s staring at him because he loves him and finds him handsome, and that’s one of the best things that has ever happened to him.</p><p>“Can I touch you?” Doyoung resumes, and Jaehyun gives him a small nod, too busy staring back at his boyfriend.</p><p>Doyoung’s body is pretty different from his: while Jaehyun likes to think he’s got the whole package that makes the fans faint, from his pecs to his abs, Doyoung’s muscles are less apparent. Jaehyun can tell he’s been hitting the gym more regularly because his pecs are bigger than they used to be, and there’s a faint trace of abs too. Doyoung is really thin, though, and that worries Jaehyun because he’s pretty sure Doyoung should have more curves if he ate normally.</p><p>It’s not like Doyoung can help it, Jaehyun himself knows how pressured they all are regarding their bodies shapes and weights. Jaehyun knows he’s good weight wise because he’s muscled so that explains he’s got a few more kilos, but for people like Doyoung who aren’t as buff, he knows the standards are pretty unhealthy.</p><p>“Do you eat enough?” Jaehyun asks, a frown appearing against his will on his face.</p><p>Doyoung, who was about to caress his stomach, stops and looks at him.</p><p>“Yeah? Why?”</p><p>“I don’t know,” Jaehyun shifts uncomfortably, “you look really thin and it worries me.”</p><p>Doyoung smiles tenderly and pecks his nose.</p><p>“Thank you for caring about me love, but I’m good. I promise I’m not dieting at the moment and I’m eating what I need.”</p><p>“Okay,” Jaehyun nods.</p><p>If Doyoung says it, there’s no need to insist.</p><p>“Thank you so much,” Doyoung repeats, “you’re the cutest for worrying about me.”</p><p>“You don’t need to thank me, you’d do the same for me,” Jaehyun replies, making eye contact with his boyfriend.</p><p>“I definitely would,” Doyoung grins, “speaking of which, are you also eating enough at the moment?”</p><p>“Yup,” Jaehyun grins back, “and now I wanna eat you,” he jokes, making Doyoung snort.</p><p>“If anyone’s getting eaten tonight, it’s you,” Doyoung retorts, smirking.</p><p>Jaehyun doesn’t have the time to answer, as Doyoung kisses him again, but this time also starts touching him. Jaehyun lets out a weak moan as Doyoung cups his pectoral muscles, squeezing them at the same time. He plays with them, kneading his sensitive skin with skilled fingers, and Jaehyun gasps as Doyoung brushes against one of his nipples with his nail.</p><p>Doyoung’s mouth leaves his to swallow a nipple, and Jaehyun can’t hold back a loud moan as Doyoung begins playing with the erected nub like with a candy he’d suck on. He’s all the more sensitive that his boyfriend is now toying with his other nipple – and Jaehyun had no idea his body could be this sensitive. He feels real pleasure from Doyoung’s ministrations, and when the latter stops sucking on his chest to breathe, he realizes that he’s half-hard.</p><p>Doyoung’s eyes are veiled with lust, which is a look Jaehyun has never seen on him before, and he can’t deny that it makes him aroused. He has no idea what he looks like, but his best guess is that his face must be really red and he can feel his fringe stick to his forehead because he’s sweating.</p><p>Doyoung comes up to kiss his lips, and Jaehyun barely answers the kiss, a little dazed. Instead, he lets Doyoung probe his mouth with his tongue, and the more they kiss, the more he feel ready to let go and let Doyoung do as he pleases with his body.</p><p>“Fuck Jae,” Doyoung laughs, “you’re so fucking sexy,” he swears, panting.</p><p>“I didn’t even do anything?” Jaehyun replies.</p><p>“You don’t need to,” Doyoung grins, “your body’s enough to drive me completely crazy.”</p><p>Jaehyun blushes, and he feels his heartbeats accelerate. Doyoung’s compliments are getting to him.</p><p>“As amazing as this feels,” Jaehyun says, frowning a bit, “it feels a bit unfair to be laying there while you do all the work…”</p><p>“Sorry baby, I wanna beep being selfish and shower you in love for now on,” Doyoung grins, “I’m getting addicted to your body,” he adds, fingers tracing Jaehyun’s abs slowly.</p><p>“You’re not being selfish,” Jaehyun protests, “but-”</p><p>“It’s completely okay for you to just lay down while I kiss you,” Doyoung interrupts, “it’s not unfair at all.”</p><p>Jaehyun pouts, not convinced.</p><p>“But I’m the only one feeling good,” he argues a last time.</p><p>“You’re mistaken,” Doyoung giggles, “I feel just as good being able to touch you so intimately.”</p><p>Jaehyun gives in, understanding he won’t win this time.</p><p>“Okay,” he concedes, “but you’ll have to let me return the favor, I wanna kiss you too.”</p><p>“Of course love, we have the whole night to ourselves so don’t worry, we’ll have plenty of time to do everything we want.”</p><p>Doyoung giggles before laying on top of Jaehyun once again to kiss him deeply, making Jaehyun moan in pleasure. Doyoung takes his sweet time to caress Jaehyun’s stomach while he’s at it, playing with the curves of his abs and making Jaehyun all ticklish. Feeling Jaehyun squirm, Doyoung breaks their kiss and laughs.</p><p>“You’re not used to getting touched there, are you?” he teases.</p><p>“Of course not,” Jaehyun protests, pouting. “You’re having way too much fun teasing me,” he complains.</p><p>“I am,” Doyoung admits.</p><p>“Well just wait until I’m the one doing the teasing, I’ll tease you to death and I won’t let you go even if you beg for it,” Jaehyun warns, making Doyoung snort.</p><p>“I am so afraid,” Doyoung says, but Jaehyun can tell he’s not. “How about you try it? Make me moan your name and you win. You can touch anywhere you want.”</p><p>“That’s so easy,” Jaehyun brags, not believing his boyfriend.</p><p>Who does Doyoung think he is? He’ll have him begging in no time.</p><p>They switch positions, Doyoung now laying on his back on the mattress and Jaehyun above him. Doyoung exudes confidence, and Jaehyun’s very determined to make him lose. He starts by kissing Doyoung, so deeply they both can’t breathe in an instant.</p><p>After he breaks the kiss, he trails down Doyoung’s neck, licking at every area that might be sensitive. He puts a few light kisses on his Adam apple, then goes down to the junction between his neck and shoulder. There, he licks and bites slowly, careful not to leave marks. He goes up all the way to Doyoung’s ears, biting and blowing hot air against them, and he smirks when he feels Doyoung tense and grab onto his biceps tighter.</p><p>“C’mon baby, you can do it,” Jaehyun whispers hotly, “it’s just my name,” he adds, biting on Doyoung’s lobe.</p><p>Doyoung remains stubbornly silent, and if anything, that fuels Jaehyun with renewed determination.</p><p>“Suit yourself, that was just the beginning anyway.”</p><p>Imitating Doyoung’s earlier actions, Jaehyun moves lower so as to reach his lover’s chest, and there, swallows a nipple, sucking on it hard. Doyoung’s panting gets more intense, but he’s not moaning yet. Jaehyun, focused, starts toying with the other nub, kneading it roughly between his fingers. It seems that Doyoung likes it rough, for Jaehyun hears him swear at his lewd actions.</p><p>Reminded that Doyoung said he could touch him anywhere, Jaehyun doesn’t see why he’d hold back – especially when he’s wanted to do such things with Doyoung for the longest time. His mouth leaves Doyoung’s swollen nipple and goes for the other, but his hands move lower: one grounds Doyoung’s hips, while the other one cups Doyoung’s half-erected length through his boxers. This time, Doyoung whines, but Jaehyun refuses to go easy on him.</p><p>He finally leaves Doyoung’s nipples to keep kissing his chest, all the while massaging his growing bulge. Doyoung is doing well, refusing to give in and Jaehyun can’t say that he doesn’t like it. Jaehyun takes a break from kissing Doyoung’s chest to breathe heavily, and he feels a little proud to see how well-kissed Doyoung’s skin looks. Some parts of his skin are wet with Jaehyun’s saliva, and there’s even a few love marks, despite Jaehyun’s efforts not to leave any.</p><p>He lays down on his side next to Doyoung, still catching his breath, and Doyoung turns so as to face him. They share a smile and Doyoung nuzzles their noses. Soon, Jaehyun wants – no, needs – to kiss him again, and he catches Doyoung’s lips with his, sucking on his bottom lip hungrily. Doyoung gets closer, and they’re doing nothing but sharing wet kisses for a while, saliva dropping on their chins and on the pillows underneath them.</p><p>“You haven’t won yet,” Doyoung reminds Jaehyun as they take a breather, looking at each other through hooded eyes.</p><p>“Don’t worry,” Jaehyun smirks.</p><p>He wraps his left arm around Doyoung’s waist, effectively bringing him closer, and the fingers of his right hand graze the top of Doyoung’s boxers.</p><p>“Can I?” Jaehyun prefers to ask, and Doyoung nods before kissing him briefly.</p><p>Doyoung lets out a whine as Jaehyun’s hand slides in his underwear, coming in direct contact with his fully erected length, and Jaehyun bites his lower lip. He moves his left hand, sliding down Doyoung’s underwear from behind as to touch his ass directly as well, and Doyoung whines some more, cuddling him closer. Jaehyun pants against Doyoung’s mouth as he gives his cock a first tentative pump, and seeing as Doyoung throws his arms around his shoulders and crashes their mouths together, he thinks he’s doing well so far.</p><p>Jaehyun thinks Doyoung might be bigger than him, and potentially a little thicker as well, because his cock feels nice in his grip, but also quite different than when he masturbates. He really likes it, he realizes as Doyoung is moaning against his swollen mouth, and he wants to hear Doyoung moan and groan more, a lot more. He tries pumping Doyoung’s cock differently, and teases his balls as well, and Doyoung’s reaction is immediate: he’s loving it.</p><p>“Doyoungie, don’t you want to make your boyfriend happy?” Jaehyun asks, slowing down the rhythm of his pumps, “all you need to do is say my name,” he adds, squeezing Doyoung’s ass gently, making Doyoung thrust his hips in his.</p><p>Doyoung doesn’t answer, but Jaehyun hasn’t given up on their little challenge yet. He decides to make Doyoung feel so good he’ll have no choice but to moan his name, and keeps up fondling Doyoung’s ass and thighs and caressing his cock. Doyoung’s embrace around him get tighter, and Jaehyun feels him coming before he hears him moaning a loud “Jaehyun!!”. Delighted he’s won, Jaehyun gently pumps Doyoung through his climax until Doyoung’s too oversensitive to be touched.</p><p>Jaehyun, super proud of himself, giggles, and he smiles in Doyoung’s tender kiss.</p><p>“Congratulations,” Doyoung says, grinning.</p><p>“I won,” Jaehyun answers, grinning back.</p><p>“I love you,” Doyoung replies, and Jaehyun blushes.</p><p>“Me too,” Jaehyun confesses, beaming.</p><p>“Let me take care of you,” Doyoung says.</p><p>Jaehyun tilts his head, not getting it, but then Doyoung squeezes his leaking cock through his underwear and he’s painfully reminded that he’s been hard for a while. He groans, and freezes as Doyoung makes him lie on his back and takes off his boxers. He watches with bewildered eyes as Doyoung takes his cock in a hand, and then swallows almost his whole length in one go.</p><p>Doyoung’s mouth is so warm and welcoming that Jaehyun has a hard time holding himself back from cumming right away; Doyoung is sucking him off for the first time and he wants to enjoy it for more than ten seconds. Doyoung’s tongue plays with his slit, making Jaehyun hiss and moan helplessly. Jaehyun forces his eyes open so as to marvel at the sight of Doyoung giving him a blowjob, head bobbing up and down as he goes down on him without hesitation. It’s so hot, to think that Doyoung really is his boyfriend and that he’s enjoying pleasuring him like this, and Jaehyun feels warm, too warm.</p><p>His determination crumbles as Doyoung makes him feel way too good, and he screams as he comes, hard. He’s shaking through his orgasm, all the more as he can still feel Doyoung’s warmth around his cock, and he closes his eyes and pants loudly as Doyoung keeps pleasuring him for a few more seconds before finally releasing his softening cock.</p><p>As he slowly regains his breath, he opens his eyes again, and blushes at the sight of Doyoung who’s sat up, wiping his mouth. Jaehyun can spot a few drops of his cum on the corner of Doyoung’s mouth, and his cheeks get even redder.</p><p>“Did you like it?” Doyoung asks, grinning as if he hadn’t been blowing him just now.</p><p>“Best fucking orgasm of my life,” Jaehyun answers honestly.</p><p>Doyoung starts laughing loudly at Jaehyun’s bluntness, and leans in, visibly for a kiss, before freezing.</p><p>“Oh, sorry, I was about to kiss you but I just had my mouth on your dick so-”</p><p>“I don’t mind,” Jaehyun cuts him off, “kiss me.”</p><p>In other conditions, Jaehyun is pretty sure he would’ve minded more, but right now, he doesn’t care. He knows they’re clean and they’re having sex anyway and honestly, he really wants to kiss Doyoung. Doyoung beams at him and they share a sensuous kiss before staring at each other.</p><p>“How bad is it if I want more?” Doyoung asks.</p><p>Jaehyun shivers.</p><p>“What are you thinking of?” Jaehyun asks.</p><p>Doyoung takes a deep breath before answering.</p><p>“I really want to fuck you.”</p><p>Jaehyun gulps down; he loves the idea.</p><p>“God, I’d love that,” he answers, and his whole body feels on fire just thinking about Doyoung fucking him.</p><p>“Are you sure?” Doyoung asks, and Jaehyun nods.</p><p>“Yes.”</p><p>“Okay,” Doyoung grins, quite seductively, “let me hear you say it first.”</p><p>“Fuck me, please,” Jaehyun says, feeling like he’s almost begging, “make me yours,” he adds, and he moans wantonly as Doyoung kisses him.</p><p>Doyoung grabs the lube and a condom before they lay on their sides again, and he sets them aside as they start making out once more. Jaehyun tries his best to mold himself to his boyfriend, and Doyoung presses his body against his, just as needy. As the time goes on, their caresses grow bolder, and Jaehyun feels ready for more. He doesn’t need to tell Doyoung, who understands his silent demand, and he takes a deep breath as Doyoung uncaps the lube bottle before squeezing some on his fingers.</p><p>“Put your leg over me,” Doyoung tells him gently, and Jaehyun does so, obedient.</p><p>He shivers as Doyoung’s fingers come closer to his sensitive rim, and he bites his lower lip as one finger slowly rubs it in circular motions. Thankfully, due to their lying position, he can hug Doyoung tightly as he gets prepared, and Doyoung can kiss him to help him relax.</p><p>Doyoung’s very slow and caring, spending some time just rubbing Jaehyun’s rim before finally inserting a first finger.</p><p>“Tell me as soon as it feels uncomfortable,” Doyoung tells him, worry visible in his eyes. “I don’t want to hurt you.”</p><p>“It feels good so far,” Jaehyun answers, sincere.</p><p>Doyoung gives him a small nod, and pushes his finger a little deeper. Jaehyun asks for a kiss, and Doyoung indulges him right away. It’s been a while since the last time he had sex, so he doesn’t know how his body will react to the pretty much foreign act, but he sometimes fingers himself so that’s at least one thing he’s familiar with.</p><p>They’re still kissing as Doyoung pushes in a second finger, loosening Jaehyun’s body with scissoring motions, and Jaehyun is thankful that Doyoung is also caressing him with his free hand. So far, he doesn’t feel that uncomfortable, their making out and the lube helping, so he’s reassured.</p><p>“You feel good,” Doyoung whispers as they’re panting against each other’s mouth.</p><p>Jaehyun nods, and closes his eyes as Doyoung inserts a third finger in him. This time, it feels bigger, and the stretch is somewhat painful, but Doyoung’s obviously on the lookout for any signs of discomfort and moves from caressing Jaehyun’s ass to his hardening cock.</p><p>Jaehyun bites his lower lip, quite enjoying the stimulation, all the more as Doyoung’s fingers in his ass are starting to feel really pleasurable. Doyoung pushes in deeper, and Jaehyun freezes as an unknown pleasure suddenly teases him from the inside. Doyoung notices his reaction, and smiles.</p><p>“It’ll feel even better soon,” he tells Jaehyun, who merely nods, feeling even needier than before. “How are you feeling baby?” Doyoung adds, looking at him fondly.</p><p>“Good,” Jaehyun croaks, “want you,” he manages to articulate, wondering how come he’s losing his mind already.</p><p>Doyoung kisses him gently, and Jaehyun hugs him closer. They share a look, and Doyoung grins.</p><p>“Tell me if it hurts,” he reminds Jaehyun, “if anything doesn’t feel good we’ll stop. Nothing’s more important than your comfort.”</p><p>“Thank you,” Jaehyun answers, appreciating that Doyoung is so caring, “I trust you.”</p><p>Doyoung pecks his lips at that, and they shift so that Jaehyun is on his back while Doyoung hovers above him. Jaehyun feels empty without Doyoung’s fingers in him, and his whole body feels hot, ready to welcome Doyoung. Doyoung puts on the condom he prepared, and lubes himself generously. Jaehyun asks for a kiss, and they remain for a few seconds just lips against lips, reassuring each other.</p><p>“I love you,” Doyoung whispers tenderly.</p><p>“I love you more,” Jaehyun answers.</p><p>Jaehyun focuses on his breathing as Doyoung finally penetrates him, slowly, and while the earlier stretching helped loosening him, it still hurts. He closes his eyes, frowning, but reminds himself that the discomfort will be gone soon.</p><p>“Does it hurt, baby?” Doyoung asks.</p><p>Jaehyun hears the worry in his voice – and as thankful as he is, he knows he’s alright and wants to keep going. He forces his eyes open and meets Doyoung’s glassy ones, and Jaehyun grins at him.</p><p>“It hurts a little,” he answers honestly, “but it’s okay, let’s just take it slowly. Don’t pull out, please.”</p><p>“Okay,” Doyoung agrees, but he stills looks a bit unsure.</p><p>“Just promise me you’ll come closer,” Jaehyun adds, because as much as he loves being able to see Doyoung while they make love, he wants to feel his skin against his too.</p><p>“Of course, you don’t even need to ask,” Doyoung grins.</p><p>A few moments after, Jaehyun’s grown used to having his boyfriend in him, and Doyoung bends down so as to kiss him. Jaehyun wraps his arms around his shoulders, and carefully hooks his legs around Doyoung’s waist. Doyoung’s so incredibly close now, and Jaehyun loves it.</p><p>“Can I move?” Doyoung asks.</p><p>“Hm-hm,” Jaehyun nods.</p><p>Doyoung carefully thrusts a first time in Jaehyun, then slowly picks up speed. Jaehyun brings Doyoung even closer, and he’s feeling very sensitive. Doyoung feels incredible in him, and he wants more of that sensation of pleasure building up in his stomach. They share looks and whisper each other love words, reassuring and comforting.</p><p>“Love you so much,” Doyoung pants against his mouth as he slows down his thrusts.</p><p>“Love you more,” Jaehyun hiccups, starting to feel overwhelmed by both his feelings for Doyoung and physical pleasure.</p><p>“Love you, love you, love you,” Doyoung repeats, going harder again, “love you-”</p><p>Jaehyun moans as Doyoung’s hips slam against his in a particular powerful thrust that makes him feel the best he’s felt so far.</p><p>“Do that again,” Jaehyun begs, “please, Doyoung!”</p><p>Doyoung seemingly knows what he’s doing because his next thrusts make Jaehyun tear up because of how good he’s feeling.</p><p>“Ah, ah, ah, ah-oh God, Doyoung, more, please, more-”</p><p>Jaehyun lets out a loud cry as Doyoung hits his prostate dead-on once again, and he knows it’s a matter of seconds before he reaches his climax. His moans get louder, a messy mix of “please” “harder” and “Doyoung”, and he lets out a sob as Doyoung starts jerking him off in rhythm with his thrusts.</p><p>Jaehyun lets go, and his orgasm hits him fully, making him see stars for a few seconds as he dirties his stomach with his semen. He feels Doyoung coming in the condom too, and he brings him against him, needing him close. Doyoung kisses him as they’re enjoying their orgasm, and they’re both groaning as Doyoung slowly pulls out.</p><p>“Come back,” Jaehyun whines when Doyoung leaves the bed.</p><p>“Oh my God, you’re such a baby,” Doyoung jokes as he comes back after throwing away the tied condom.</p><p>Jaehyun makes a happy noise as Doyoung hops on the bed, and visibly wonders where to go.</p><p>“Hold on,” he says, grabbing a tissue and wiping Jaehyun’s cum-covered stomach, “better,” he says, nodding to himself before settling on top of Jaehyun with a happy sigh.</p><p>“Can we get married?” Jaehyun asks, and Doyoung bursts out in laughter.</p><p>“What? Why?” Doyoung asks, almost choking because he’s laughing too hard.</p><p>“Because tonight was amazing,” Jaehyun answers, pouting, and Doyoung looks at him with tenderness and amusement.</p><p>“So all it takes to steal your heart is make you food and suck your dick,” Doyoung jokes, and Jaehyun hits his arm.</p><p>“You’re terrible,” Jaehyun says, “forget it, I don’t want to marry you.”</p><p>“Ow, you know I’m joking,” Doyoung says, rubbing his face against Jaehyun’s chest, “I’d marry you in a heart-beat if I could.”</p><p>Jaehyun blushes at that, and he squeezes Doyoung tighter in his arms.</p><p>“How are you feeling?” Doyoung asks, caressing Jaehyun’s arms.</p><p>“In heaven,” Jaehyun answers honestly, making Doyoung giggle.</p><p>“Me too,” he tells him, kissing his lips briefly, “let’s keep cuddling for now and then go to the bathroom to clean up?”</p><p>“Hm-hm.”</p><p> </p><p>They just made love, yet Jaehyun feels warm seeing Doyoung’s naked body near his in the shower stall. After running some water on their bodies, Doyoung squeezes some shower gel in his hands and starts washing Jaehyun, very gently. Jaehyun blushes at his boyfriend’s actions, and he realizes he’s more sensitive than he thought as Doyoung touches him everywhere.</p><p>“Tell me if you want to do it yourself,” Doyoung tells him, and Jaehyun nods, all red.</p><p>Jaehyun can’t help it, although he tries to reason himself, but the moment Doyoung starts washing his torso, hands going up and down and rubbing his sensitive nipples and stomach, he gets-half hard.</p><p>“Oopsie,” Doyoung says, giggling, “sorry, is that because I’m helping you wash up?”</p><p>Jaehyun looks away, ashamed that Doyoung caught him, and mumbles something barely audible.</p><p>“I can help you with that too,” Doyoung tells him his ear, making him shiver.</p><p>Doyoung’s hands come up on his arms, caressing his biceps, and Jaehyun whines.</p><p>“It’s okay baby,” Doyoung whispers, “want you to feel good,” he adds, licking Jaehyun’s ear.</p><p>“Can we, um, together?” Jaehyun asks in a small voice, and Doyoung laughs.</p><p>“Yes, I’d love that.”</p><p>After rinsing their cleaned bodies, Doyoung gently takes hold of his and Jaehyun’s erected cocks and brings them together, making them both whine. Jaehyun initiates a wet kiss as Doyoung jerks them off together, and they get lost into each other.</p><p> </p><p>Jaehyun crashes onto Doyoung’s freshly made bed with a sigh of relief, and he’s joined by his boyfriend who spoons him. They didn’t bother with clothes except for clean boxers (Jaehyun had to borrow a pair because he didn’t want to go back to his room), and it feels perfect this way. Doyoung turns off the lights, and he cuddles closer to Jaehyun.</p><p>“I love you so much,” Doyoung whispers in Jaehyun’s ear.</p><p>“I love you too,” Jaehyun answers, turning around so that they can kiss before returning to his original position.</p><p>“Sweet dreams baby,” Doyoung adds, closing his eyes.</p><p>“Thank you, you too love.”</p>
<hr/><p>Jaehyun wakes up the next morning and immediately wonders where he is because he doesn’t recognize his room. However, when he feels an arm around him, he remembers his date with Doyoung, and everything becomes crystal clear. He briefly wonders if he dreamed some of the things they did, but the pain in his lower back tells him that nope, everything was very much real.</p><p>Jaehyun lays his head on Doyoung’s pillow again, and listens to his boyfriend’s breathing: he’s still asleep. Jaehyun realizes he left his phone on Doyoung’s desk, so he can’t check what time it is – but nevermind that, he doesn’t want to bother Doyoung and wake him up just so he can know the time. He ponders about turning because he wants to see Doyoung’s face, and ends up doing so, slowly.</p><p>Doyoung’s face is half-buried in his own pillow, his black hair is a mess, but he looks so cute. Jaehyun smiles fondly, and makes himself comfortable so as to stare at Doyoung’s asleep traits. Without his usual make-up, his dark circles are more apparent and he’s got a few small pimples, but he still looks good. Jaehyun knows he’s biased, too, that’s very much a thing.</p><p>He feels so lucky to be able to call Doyoung his boyfriend. It hasn’t been long, but all of his thoughts revolve around Doyoung and Doyoung only. It’ll pass with time, Jaehyun figures, it’s the whole honeymoon phase that makes him feel like everything between them is perfect. He hopes they’ll keep being happy together, though, and that there won’t be too many negative things overcoming the positive ones.</p><p>“How long have you been watching me sleeping?” Doyoung asks, and Jaehyun jumps in surprise.</p><p>“You’re awake?” he asks, grinning.</p><p>“Hm-hm,” Doyoung nods, but his eyes are still closed.</p><p>Jaehyun caresses his hair, gently, and Doyoung moans like a happy puppy. Mindful of their respective morning breaths, Jaehyun moves closer and hugs Doyoung to his chest, kissing his hair and not his face. Doyoung moans again, and seems pretty content to bury his face in Jaehyun’s chest.</p><p>“Did you sleep well?” Jaehyun asks, caressing Doyoung’s back and shoulders.</p><p>“Yes, even dreamed of you,” Doyoung replies, hugging Jaehyun’s waist. “Don’t remember what we were doing in my dream exactly but yeah. What about you?”</p><p>“I didn’t dream of you,” Jaehyun laments, “but I slept well.”</p><p>“It’s okay, you don’t need to rely on dreams anymore since we’re awake, I’m right here,” Doyoung tells him, and Jaehyun melts.</p><p>“Can I make you breakfast?” Jaehyun asks, feeling a little overwhelmed and wanting to spoil his boyfriend.</p><p>“Yay, breakfast!” Doyoung cheers.</p><p>Given they showered in the middle of the night following their activities, they agree on just dressing up but brushing their teeth. As soon as they’re done, Doyoung pulls Jaehyun into a kiss, and Jaehyun answers it with enthusiasm. They exit the bathroom holding hands, and as they go through the living room on their way to the kitchen, the members present raise their eyebrows at their unusual closeness.</p><p>“We’re dating,” Doyoung announces with a big smile, while Jaehyun giggles.</p><p>“Uh, okay?” Haechan says from the couch from he’s sitting on Taeil’s lap sideways, “is that supposed to be breaking news?”</p><p>Jaehyun stops giggling and Doyoung’s smiling face turns into a surprised expression.</p><p>“I thought you were already a couple,” Haechan shrugs, “right babe?” he asks Taeil.</p><p>“I thought so too,” Taeil admits with a sheepish smile, “but congratulations!”</p><p>Jaehyun gets over his surprise, and hugs Doyoung to him, feeling happy; if Taeil and Haechan thought they were already together, that means they’ve got great couple chemistry!</p><p>“So that was you two,” Yuta’s voice interrupts Jaehyun’s happy trail of thoughts, “you were in Doyoung’s room last night, right?”</p><p>Jaehyun gulps down as Yuta sounds uncharacteristically annoyed, and he gives him a small nod.</p><p>“Why?” Doyoung asks, not getting it.</p><p>“Which one of you was it that kept moaning like a little bitch the whole night? ‘cause look, I’m delighted you two are getting the dick some of us can’t get, really I am – but I couldn’t fall asleep because you were so noisy and I was honestly considering breaking in to tell you to shut it.”</p><p>Jaehyun’s cheeks turn bright red as he realizes that between him and Doyoung, he was probably the loudest one last night – and he had completely forgotten about Yuta and Jungwoo sleeping in the room next to Doyoung’s. He lets out an embarrassed noise and hides behind Doyoung.</p><p>“So it was you!” Yuta barks, and Jaehyun apologizes.</p><p>“You should gag Jaehyun next time,” Haechan suggests to Doyoung before letting out an evil laughter.</p><p>Jaehyun buries his face in Doyoung’s neck, even more embarrassed – and he’s resenting Taeil a little for letting his demon of a boyfriend say such scandalous things in public.</p><p>“We’ll be more careful next time,” Doyoung promises Yuta with a smile that looks more like a grimace, and the elder nods as if he had decided to spare Doyoung and Jaehyun’s lives just this once.</p><p>“Pft, couldn’t be us,” Haechan brags, “you guys are amateurs.”</p><p>“Okay honey, that’s enough,” Taeil tells his boyfriend, but Haechan, unfazed, merely beams at him before stealing a kiss off his lips, making Jungwoo sigh from the other end of the couch.</p><p>As they’re making their way to the kitchen, Jaehyun sends a sympathizing look to Jungwoo. He knows he’s been missing Lucas a lot recently, all the more as Lucas keeps having schedules abroad and it’s putting a strain on their relationship. Jungwoo meets his eyes, and he waves as if to say “don’t worry about me” but Jaehyun makes a mental note to go spend some time with him later.</p><p>They finally enter the kitchen, and there, they see Johnny washing his hands after visibly eating. Jaehyun beams at him, and Johnny’s eyes fall on their intertwined hands.</p><p>“Meet my boyfriend,” Jaehyun tells him, back-hugging Doyoung and resting his chin on his shoulder.</p><p>“You’re dumb,” Doyoung tells him, despite his obvious amusement.</p><p>“Nice to meet you boyfriend, I’m his best friend,” Johnny answers, and Doyoung laughs.</p><p>“Don’t encourage him,” Doyoung tells Johnny. “He’s dumb enough as it is.”</p><p>“You think I’m dumb?” Jaehyun asks on a betrayed tone, letting Doyoung go.</p><p>“Of course,” Doyoung tells him, “how else would you have fallen in love with me?”</p><p>There’s a small silence, and Johnny chuckles.</p><p>“C’mon, no fighting, you guys are perfect for each other,” he says, patting both their heads as he passes by them, “I gotta go now, eat well!”</p><p>Jaehyun smiles brightly at him and waves before turning back to Doyoung.</p><p>“Food now!”</p><p>Doyoung kisses him, and Jaehyun brings him closer.</p>
<hr/><p>This is yet another regular morning at the dorms, everyone getting ready before the upcoming schedule of the day and Jaehyun is, as always, looking forward to spending a few intimate minutes with his boyfriend to kiss him good morning and tell him he loves him. They’ve been together for a good six months by now and Jaehyun loves the small habits they have every morning and night.</p><p>He’s on his way to Doyoung’s room after brushing his teeth and knocks lightly on the door. To his surprise, Doyoung doesn’t answer the door but Taeyong does, and Jaehyun can see Doyoung in the middle of the room. Jaehyun sends a surprised look to Taeyong.</p><p>“Can I come in?” he asks, and Taeyong doesn’t have time to answer because Doyoung does.</p><p>“Not today Jae,” he says, “I need to speak to Taeyong.”</p><p>“Oh, okay,” Jaehyun answers, and he tries his best to ignore the way his heart squeezes painfully in his chest, “I’ll see you later then.”</p><p>He turns on his heels and goes to his room, feeling weird. There are mornings where they can’t spend time together, but it’s never been like this. Jaehyun bites his lower lip, and debates sending a message to Doyoung. He decides against it, figuring he’ll have time to talk to him later during the day. He leaves his room as Yuta lets him know they’re leaving the dorms for the company, and to his disappointment, gets sent to a different schedule than Doyoung.</p><p>He’s busy the whole day, and when he finally comes back to the dorms, he rushes to the shower and then heads for Doyoung’s room. Jungwoo, who was with Doyoung on his schedule, lets him know the elder already went back to his room after his shower, so Jaehyun knocks on Doyoung’s door for the second time that day and hopes to see his boyfriend this time.</p><p>Doyoung gets the door, and Jaehyun’s heart hurts when he notices how sad his boyfriend looks. His eyes are rimmed with red, making Jaehyun guess he’s been crying, and his lips are all bitten. Jaehyun doesn’t think he’s ever wanted to hold Doyoung more than he does now, but he knows his lover needs his space.</p><p>“Baby, can I come in?” he asks, gently.</p><p>Doyoung nods and goes back on his bed, letting Jaehyun lock the door behind him. Jaehyun joins him on the bed, sitting at first because he’s not sure what to do.</p><p>“Do you need a hug?” Jaehyun asks, and Doyoung nods once more. “Okay, let’s lay down and get comfortable.”</p><p>They lay on their side, facing each other and Jaehyun hugging Doyoung tightly to him. Doyoung tucks his face under his chin, and Jaehyun shivers when he feels him sob in his neck.</p><p>“Oh no, my baby,” Jaehyun says, feeling his own tears come up, “baby, what’s wrong?”</p><p>Doyoung doesn’t answer – Jaehyun guesses he can’t – and keeps crying, letting out broken sobs that break Jaehyun’s heart. He wants to do so much more for him, he wishes he could make Doyoung’s pain disappear, because feeling powerless when the person who means the most to him is in pain is the worst.</p><p>So he hugs him, tells him comforting words, that it’s okay to cry. Doyoung has a hard time calming down, and even when he comes out of Jaehyun’s neck after crying his heart out, there are still new tears running on his cheeks. Jaehyun helps him sit up and gives him the box of tissues from his bedside table, letting him clean his nose and eyes.</p><p>“Do you want to tell me what’s hurting you?” Jaehyun asks, caressing Doyoung’s cheeks.</p><p>“I feel so bad about myself,” Doyoung answers, more like croaks because his usual beautiful speaking voice is broken with sadness, “I feel so unlovable, I feel so ugly and talentless and so fucking useless, I hate myself.”</p><p>“No,” Jaehyun blurts out before he can stop himself, “I mean, that’s how you feel but God, you’re so wrong.”</p><p>Jaehyun needs to take a deep breath because Doyoung’s words towards himself are so cruel he can’t believe his boyfriend really said that.</p><p>“Doyoung baby, my baby, my adorable, incredible, amazing and angelic baby, you’re so, so, so wrong for thinking so badly of yourself. You can ask anyone and they’ll tell you how stunning you are and how much they love you as a person because you’re someone who’s so good, so caring, so lovable. You can ask me, you can ask the others, you can ask your family or your fans, everyone will agree with me.”</p><p>Jaehyun wipes away Doyoung’s new tears following his heart-felt speech, and doesn’t care for his own tears. He doesn’t want Doyoung to remain in that hurtful, self-hatred mood.</p><p>“It breaks my heart to hear you say such ugly and untrue things about yourself, they’re all false. I love you so much, I love you more than anything – I’d do literally anything for you so please, I’m begging you, please rely on me. I’ll listen if you have those negative things to get out of your mind, but I’ll be there to fill your mind with nothing but love and positivity in exchange.”</p><p>Jaehyun leans in to kiss Doyoung tenderly, and doesn’t mind how salty their kiss tastes. He kisses Doyoung through tears, desperate to let him know how much he loves and cares for him.</p><p>“I love you, I love you,” Jaehyun whispers, “I love you so much I don’t even have the words to express it.”</p><p>“I love you too,” Doyoung croaks, “thank you Jaehyun, I love you too, so, so much.”</p><p>“Negative thoughts leave my boyfriend alone,” Jaehyun jokes as he brings Doyoung to himself, hugging his shoulders tightly.</p><p>They hug for a few minutes, and Jaehyun is about to speak up when Doyoung’s stomach rumbles loudly.</p><p>“Did you have dinner?” Jaehyun asks, releasing his embrace so his eyes can meet Doyoung’s.</p><p>“I skipped dinner,” Doyoung admits, looking away.</p><p>“Oh no, love,” Jaehyun says, sadly, “let’s have dinner now, then. I didn’t have time to eat either.”</p><p>Doyoung nods.</p><p>“I’ll order your favorite food and we can watch something as we eat, okay?” Jaehyun offers.</p><p>Doyoung nods once again, and Jaehyun kisses him deeply.</p><p>They keep kissing once Jaehyun’s done ordering food, and Jaehyun makes sure to cuddle Doyoung and let him know how much he’s loved. By the time Jaehyun brings the food to Doyoung’s room, Doyoung has cheered up compared to earlier, and Jaehyun, despite knowing it’ll be a little difficult for him to eat like this, wraps an arm around him as they start watching a movie. He insists that Doyoung should eat a lot because the food will help with his sadness, and Doyoung complies.</p><p>Despite their exhaustion, Jaehyun insists that they brush their teeth, and exceptionally, they cuddle together to sleep in Doyoung’s room. Doyoung falls asleep first, and Jaehyun follows him, hugging him tightly. The following morning, Jaehyun makes sure to kiss Doyoung and comfort him again, and Doyoung promises that he’ll rely on him more in the future.</p>
<hr/><p>Jaehyun is snacking in the kitchen when his phone suddenly buzzes with a new notification. He lazily unlocks his phone to read the message, and his eyebrows knot into a frown: Johnny’s asking him to come to his room, urgently. He replies that he’ll be there in a minute, and immediately cleans the table from the empty snacks packages.</p><p>As he’s making his way to his best friend’s room, he passes by Jungwoo, who’s nicely dressed.</p><p>“Oh?” Jaehyun says, wiggling his eyebrows, “does someone happen to have a date?”</p><p>Jungwoo grins brightly, and nods.</p><p>“Lucas came back to Korea yesterday so we’re meeting today,” Jungwoo explains, his cheeks pinkish.</p><p>“Have fun, you’ve waited forever to see him,” Jaehyun smiles, “tell him I said hi!”</p><p>“I will,” Jungwoo nods, “see you later!”</p><p>Jaehyun watches as his younger friend makes his hasty way to the door, and he feels happy that the two lovers can finally meet again after months. His thoughts suddenly go to his own boyfriend, and he sighs in happiness. He’s so lucky he can see him every day.</p><p>But now’s not the time to be daydreaming about Doyoung, Jaehyun reminds himself. He knocks on Johnny’s door before coming in. He closes the door behind him, and joins his best friend on his bed.</p><p>“Hey, is everything okay?” Jaehyun asks, his frown back now that he’s seeing Johnny who looks highly distressed.</p><p>“Nothing’s okay,” Johnny answers, making Jaehyun worry.</p><p>Jaehyun comes closer so as to take one of Johnny’s hands in his, and he gives it a gentle squeeze.</p><p>“What is it?”</p><p>“I did something stupid,” Johnny replies, looking away.</p><p>“Define stupid,” Jaehyun asks, a little confused, “because there’s an awful lot of us who do stupid shit all the time here.”</p><p>“Stupid as in I got drunk and slept with someone,” Johnny confesses, and Jaehyun freezes.</p><p>“Oh,” he says, not knowing what else to answer to that unexpected confession.</p><p>Johnny lets out a whine and he lets his face fall on Jaehyun’s shoulder, hiding in his neck. Jaehyun tentatively pets Johnny’s hair, and hesitates before asking his next question.</p><p>“Is it someone from the dorms?”</p><p>Johnny nods.</p><p>“It’s not someone who’s already taken, right?” Jaehyun can’t help but make sure.</p><p>“Of course not! I’m dumb but not that dumb,” Johnny protests.</p><p>“… How about you just tell me who it was?” Jaehyun suggests.</p><p>There’s not that many options left if it’s someone who’s single, Jaehyun thinks. In their 127 dorms, it can only be Mark or Yuta, then – but Jaehyun can’t imagine Johnny and Mark together, so it must have been Yuta.</p><p>“Yuta,” Johnny finally admits, whining some more, “it was Yuta.”</p><p>“Uh, well, at least he’s single,” Jaehyun says, a bit clumsily, “and he’s pretty cute?”</p><p>“You think Yuta is cute when you’ve got a boyfriend?” Johnny asks, finally getting his face out of Jaehyun’s neck.</p><p>“Having a boyfriend and acknowledging that Yuta is good-looking are two separate things!” Jaehyun protests, “of course there’s no one but Doyoung for me! But it’d be weird to deny that Yuta isn’t an attractive person.”</p><p>Johnny nods, and Jaehyun sighs.</p><p>“So, how did this all happen?” Jaehyun asks.</p><p>It’s Johnny’s turn to sigh, and he briefly buries his face in his hands before replying.</p><p>“Yesterday night Yuta offered to eat together and watch a movie and I had nothing planned, so of course, I said yes. We were in my room the whole night, but eventually we started drinking a lot because we bought way too much alcohol, and…”</p><p>Johnny interrupts himself to sigh, as if remembering what happened next is making him dizzy. Jaehyun doesn’t say anything, letting Johnny collect his thoughts because it appears he needs a moment.</p><p>“… and then he got closer to me,” Johnny recalls, “and I didn’t realize how close he really was because I was so out of it,” he adds, “and he started touching me like this,” he tells Jaehyun, putting his hand under his tee-shirt.</p><p>Jaehyun freezes, not liking their sudden closeness and the way Johnny’s touching him. He coughs, trying to make his best friend understand that maybe he could take off his hand from under his shirt, but Johnny’s so involved in his story telling that Jaehyun’s cough doesn’t have any effect.</p><p>“So of course, my first thought was “oh no we shouldn’t be doing this,” Johnny explains, and Jaehyun understands but also he’s still quite uncomfortable even if it doesn’t seem that Johnny will show him more of Yuta’s actions. “And then he kissed me and any self-restraint I may have still had just completely left my brain so I kissed him back and-”</p><p>“Uh, what are you two doing?” Doyoung’s voice suddenly asks, and Jaehyun bangs his head on the wall as he jumps in surprise.</p><p>His eyes meet his boyfriend’s, and Jaehyun gulps down painfully as Doyoung’s eyes fall down on Johnny’s hand that’s still under his shirt. It doesn’t take a genius to understand that the situation looks very sketchy, and the last thing Jaehyun wants is a fight with his boyfriend because his best friend is dumb and can’t keep his hands to himself.</p><p>“This is not what it looks like,” Johnny says, and Jaehyun is surprised he’s the one saying this because Jaehyun should be the one trying to defend himself.</p><p>Doyoung squints, and Jaehyun’s heart squeezes in his chest. He hopes Doyoung isn’t thinking that he’s cheating because god, he could never, but Doyoung can’t read his mind. Jaehyun first slaps Johnny’s hand away and Johnny goes “ouch”.</p><p>“This really isn’t what it looks like,” Jaehyun says, and Doyoung doesn’t look convinced.</p><p>“No, really, listen Doyoung,” Johnny says, “I was telling Jaehyun something and I ended up touching him like this because of what I was telling him but I didn’t have any bad intents, I promise.”</p><p>“What were you talking about?” Doyoung asks, and Jaehyun feels relieved that his boyfriend looks less tense.</p><p>“I did something dumb and I needed Jaehyun’s advice,” Johnny explains.</p><p>Jaehyun gets up on his feet and gets closer to Doyoung, who takes a step back. Jaehyun stops in his tracks, and sends him a pleading gaze.</p><p>“Doyoung, it’s the truth,” Jaehyun says, slowly, “I would never, ever cheat on you, I love you too much for that. Please.”</p><p>Jaehyun is feeling this close to crying and he really hates that this situation is becoming worse and worse just because of a misunderstanding. Does Doyoung really have so little trust in him? Jaehyun feels like he’s voiced countless times to Doyoung that he means the world to him, he could never betray him.</p><p>“Okay,” Doyoung says, nodding, “sorry for overreacting.”</p><p>Jaehyun throws himself in his arms, a few tears escaping his eyes and rolling on his pale cheeks.</p><p>“I love you, I love you, I love you,” Jaehyun repeats, embracing Doyoung so tight he’s pretty sure he can’t breathe.</p><p>“Me too,” Doyoung answers, hugging him back, “me too.”</p><p>When they finally break away, Doyoung goes “oh” noticing that Jaehyun’s eyes are wet.</p><p>“I’m sorry,” he apologizes once again, cupping Jaehyun’s cheeks and kissing him gently.</p><p>Jaehyun hugs him once more and hides his face in his neck, resulting in Doyoung patting his back.</p><p> </p><p>A few minutes later, once they’re all calmed, Doyoung and Jaehyun are sitting side by side on Johnny’s bed while Johnny is perched on his desk chair. Doyoung told them he might as well stay now that he was here, and Johnny agreed, saying he didn’t mind him being here.</p><p>“Maybe you’ll give me better advice than Jaehyun,” Johnny said, making Doyoung snort and Jaehyun protest he hadn’t even said anything yet.</p><p>Jaehyun, grumbling, circles Doyoung’s waist and brings him closer to him. Doyoung leans into him and Johnny makes a comment about them being too lovey-dovey with each other, resulting in Doyoung glaring at him and Jaehyun sticking out his tongue.</p><p>“Anyway, back to your problem,” Jaehyun says.</p><p>Doyoung listens attentively as Johnny explains what happened with Yuta last night, and he’s as shocked, if not more, than Jaehyun. Jaehyun intertwines their fingers, and Doyoung massages his forehead with his free hand.</p><p>“So you and Yuta fucked last night and now you don’t know what to do,” Doyoung sums up, sighing. “That’s, uh, difficult to deal with for sure.”</p><p>Johnny nods, and Jaehyun bites his lower lip.</p><p>“I haven’t seen Yuta today,” Jaehyun says. “So I don’t know how he is. Do you think he’s forgotten about what you did or...?”</p><p>“I know that we showered together – because somehow we managed to do that after our, um, activities, and I remember going back to my room, but I don’t know if he went back to his own room. This morning when I woke up, I was alone.”</p><p>The three of them sigh, and Jaehyun sends a worried look to Johnny. He’s seldom seen him this distressed, and he doesn’t know what to do to help him.</p><p>“I think,” Doyoung starts, “that the best to do would be the obvious: you have to talk with him about what happened, and see what you decide to do about it.”</p><p>“Do you want to date him?” Jaehyun asks, “if you slept with him, even taking into account the fact that you were both under the influence of alcohol, it must mean that you’re somewhat attracted to him, right?”</p><p>“I’m not sure,” Johnny admits honestly, “I’m not entirely sure of my feelings for him. Sure, he’s good-looking, we get along, but do I like him…?”</p><p>There’s a silence, and Doyoung speaks up again.</p><p>“Then maybe try doing this the other way around,” Doyoung suggests, “ask him how he feels about you, and from then you can decide on what to do.”</p><p>“That sounds good,” Jaehyun agrees, smiling at Johnny encouragingly. “I think the most urgent thing to do now is talk to him. You can’t come up with a solution on your own, it’s got to be about the two of you.”</p><p>Johnny sighs heavily, and hides his face in his hands for a few seconds before nodding at Doyoung and Jaehyun’s words.</p><p>“Okay, I’ll do that today. Thanks, guys.”</p><p>Jaehyun lets go of Doyoung’s hand to get up and pull Johnny into a much needed comforting hug. Doyoung even joins the hug, and Johnny embraces the two of them back.</p><p> </p><p>Eventually, Jaehyun and Doyoung depart from Johnny’s room to go spend some time together, and all that’s left for Johnny is to kick his own ass to go see Yuta. It obviously is easier to say than to do, and Johnny really doesn’t want to have this kind of conversation with his bandmate. At the same time, it’s now or never. Ignoring that they kissed and fucked yesterday and pretending it never happened sounds worse than facing the issue they created by letting themselves go.</p><p>Johnny wants to curse at himself for acting the way he did. He knows he can’t blame Yuta for the whole thing, and that he can’t entirely blame alcohol either. Deep down, he acknowledges that when Yuta leaned in and pushed his tongue in his mouth, lighting his skin on fire with his caresses, he wanted this to happen, and he fully accepted what Yuta wanted to give him. If he focuses, he can remember what kissing Yuta was like, what his tongue tasted like against his, and he can almost hear the way Yuta moaned as their kisses deepened. Yuta was soft, pliant under his touch, and sex with him was amazing.</p><p>Thinking about all of this actually makes the matter worse, Johnny realizes, because the more he remembers his night with Yuta, the more he wants to experience it all again. He lets out a sigh, and massages his forehead. If he really does like Yuta, then it feels different from liking Jaehyun. There’s not butterflies in his stomach, but instead there’s warmth, familiar, comforting. Thinking about Yuta both stresses him and eases him, but he does feel fondness overcome at the thought of him.</p><p>He’s made a cross on ever dating Jaehyun, slowly but surely moving on, so if his heart leans towards Yuta instead, why not give it a try?</p><p>Johnny gulps down before knocking lightly on the door of Yuta and Jungwoo’s shared room. He overheard that Jungwoo was going on a date with Lucas somewhere outside of the dorms, so if anyone is inside, it should be Yuta. Hopefully he’s alone, Johnny thinks.</p><p>“Come in,” Yuta’s voice resonates from behind the door.</p><p>Johnny closes his eyes, takes a deep breath, and pushes the handle.</p><p>Yuta is sitting on his bed, visibly still in pjs, and what stands out the most about him is his messy hair. Upon seeing Johnny, Yuta straightens his back and pulls most of his hair back before trying to fix it with a hair tie. Johnny closes the door, and stands awkwardly in the middle of the room, not exactly knowing how to start the dreaded conversation. He doesn’t want to sit on Jungwoo’s bed, although it’d allow him to face Yuta, so he just kinda waits for Yuta to speak.</p><p>“Hey,” Yuta croaks.</p><p>It’s obvious he’s not entirely recovered from yesterday, Johnny notes.</p><p>“Um, you can sit down on my bed if you’d like, don’t stay there standing up,” Yuta says before moving and making some space on the mattress.</p><p>Johnny sits down carefully, and there’s a heavy silence between them. Yuta is looking at his lap, busy turning and twisting a loose string of his blanket, while Johnny is staring at the wall facing them, mind blank. There’s so much to say, and yet neither know where to begin.</p><p>“About yesterday,” Yuta breaks the awkward silence, voice low, “I’m sorry if I went too far. I’m not sure what came over me, and I won’t blame the alcohol nor you, and I’m really, deeply sorry if now you’re regretting what happened.”</p><p>Johnny blinks.</p><p>“No,” he says, “it’s okay, really, don’t blame yourself-”</p><p>“How can I not?” Yuta retorts, cutting him off, “I totally jumped on you and initiated the whole thing-”</p><p>“But I don’t mind!” Johnny says, shaking his head, “I kissed you back, didn’t I? Everything you did, I did too.”</p><p>Yuta looks at him, eyes widening a little.</p><p>“So now, what?” he asks, his voice trembling a little, “where does that leave us?”</p><p>“I’m not sure,” Johnny replies honestly, “I’m not sure what my feelings for you are exactly, but I didn’t dislike what we did.”</p><p>At that, Yuta laughs a little.</p><p>“You didn’t dislike it,” he repeats, and Johnny feels a little less stressed that Yuta seems amused, “well I didn’t dislike it either,” he says, “and to be very honest with you I quite like you as in, more than just a friend.”</p><p>“A close friend?” Johnny asks, teasing, and Yuta hits him with a pillow.</p><p>“You dumbass,” Yuta says, hitting him a second time.</p><p>“That’s not a very nice thing to say to someone in whom you’re interested,” Johnny says, catching Yuta’s pillow.</p><p>“Maybe that someone deserves it,” Yuta argues, but he lets go of the pillow with a smile.</p><p>Johnny answers his smile, and there’s a brief silence.</p><p>“Would you like to go on a date with me?” Yuta asks, looking at his lap once again.</p><p>Johnny feels fondness overcome him seeing how cute Yuta looks.</p><p>“I’d love that,” Johnny nods.</p><p>To his surprise, Yuta leans into him, enough to settle in his arms for a loose hug. Johnny welcomes him there, wrapping his arms around him, and Yuta sighs.</p><p>“Let me just hide there a minute or two, I’m feeling embarrassed.”</p><p>Johnny kisses his hair, and rests his head atop of his.</p><p>“It’s fine, you can stay there for as long as you want.”</p><p>Yuta presses a kiss to his neck, and they fall into a comfortable silence.</p>
<hr/><p>“Is everyone here and ready?” Taeyong asks, and the rest of the 127 unit nod at him.</p><p>They’re backstage waiting to be called for the variety show they’re recording today, and everyone is in a good mood, mostly thanks to the nice lunch they had with the crew of the show on which they’re guesting. Jaehyun looks out for Doyoung, and his heart misses a beat when he sees him standing a few meters away, so good-looking it hurts; he’s recently dyed his hair a light pink that suits him unfairly well, and his outfit for the day is also pastel colored, matching with his cute hair.</p><p>Jaehyun was sitting next to him when they were getting their make up done, and he almost sighed lovingly as he saw him getting pink eye make up and some sparkly eyeshadow.</p><p>“You look like a fairy,” Jaehyun joked as the make up artists agreed with him.</p><p>“Shush,” Doyoung said, obviously a bit embarrassed by the comparison.</p><p>And now here they are, and Jaehyun misses Doyoung even though he’s right here. But they’re in public, he can’t be obvious with his signs of affection for his lover. That said, he thinks while looking around, some couples visibly don’t care about being obvious; Haechan is back-hugging Taeil while the latter chats with Yuta and Johnny, and the sun-moon couple seems perfectly content with their public display of affection.</p><p>But Haechan is always obvious with Taeil, Jaehyun reminds himself, and everyone exterior to the group thinks they’re just close friends and that Haechan is just particularly clingy. If he were to suddenly hug Doyoung out of nowhere or flirt with him, it’d immediately stand out and they’d be exposed. Jaehyun sighs, but cheers up by thinking that tonight they have a movie date planned.</p><p>“Let’s go,” Taeyong says, gathering the members, “they’re calling us.”</p><p>Jaehyun walks besides Jungwoo as they enter the room in which they’ll film today, and they make some quick chit-chat before the MCs greet them and invite them to sit down on chairs. From what Jaehyun understood during lunch with the staff and from the brief introduction to the show their manager did, it’ll be mostly games, which is something Jaehyun is quite on board with. He can’t help but wonder if there’ll be a chance he’ll be paired with Doyoung for at least one game, but quickly focuses as the filming starts.</p><p> </p><p>They’re soon paired in teams after drawing colored sticks: Doyoung, Jaehyun, Taeyong, and Jungwoo in one team and Yuta, Johnny, Taeil, Haechan and Mark in the other. Jaehyun joins the collective cheering of his team when Jungwoo is the final member to join, and he’s delighted with the team members he ended with.</p><p>He’s very excited to work with Doyoung especially because on top of having a good chemistry, they’re both competitive and he’s sure they’ll make things interesting. He supposes that Doyoung and Taeyong as a duo could also spice things up quite a bit, given they’re always either hugging or fighting each other, and Jungwoo will be perfect in the midst of all of this.</p><p>They alternate short talking segments with the games, and it’s obvious everyone is having a lot of fun, the staff included. The MCs sometimes cheer for one team or the other, or even try to pit them against each other. Filming goes on, and the MCs introduce the final game: a round of pepero game. The members cheer and laugh with them, and Jaehyun’s excited, hoping with all of his heart that he will be paired with Doyoung at some point.</p><p>He tries to hide his overwhelming happiness when he does get told he’ll do his round with Doyoung, and he shares a quick glance with his boyfriend. Doyoung seems to be as excited as him, but also a bit worried, which Jaehyun understands. Jungwoo and Taeyong are paired with each other, and in the other team, Mark doesn’t have to play as Johnny will do a round with Yuta while Taeil and Haechan will play together.</p><p> </p><p>Jaehyun thought this was going to be a regular game until the staff hands the MCs some masks to cover their eyes. Oh my God, Jaehyun thinks to himself, sweating. He doesn’t have time to lament more that Jungwoo and Taeyong are called to play first. Everyone cheers on them as Jungwoo bites enthusiastically on the pepero stick while Taeyong whines loudly, and their stick eventually breaks. The leftover piece is still three centimeters long, which Jaehyun guesses won’t be enough for them to win, but since they’re the first duo that played, they’re the winners so far.</p><p>Johnny and Yuta are next, and Jaehyun tries not to snicker seeing his best friend blushing faintly from being so close to his boyfriend. Yuta’s seemingly more confident, as there are no traces of apparent blush on his cheeks, and Mark keeps going “oh my God guys” as Yuta bites the stick almost all the way to Johnny’s lips. He stops right before they can kiss, and picks up the leftover piece that’s less than a centimeter long. Yuta is still not blushing but Johnny is obviously embarrassed and Jaehyun teases him along with Taeyong.</p><p>“Okay, Doyoung and Jaehyun next!” one of the MCs calls, and Jaehyun’s teasing grin disappears.</p><p>He sits so as to face Doyoung, and they share an anxious glance. Next to Jaehyun, Jungwoo is teasing them, and Haechan and Taeil are also snickering. Jaehyun watches as Doyoung puts the pepero stick between his lips, and him and Jaehyun put on their eyemask at the same time. Jaehyun then realizes that he doesn’t know where he should bite the pepero stick, so he leans in hesitantly as everyone laughs seeing him struggle.</p><p>He finally feels the stick graze his lips and bites on it before slowly making his way to Doyoung’s mouth. His ears feel like they’re stuffed with cotton because while he does hear the comments thrown his way, he’s so aware of being physically close to Doyoung that his hearing is affected by it. Because of the eyemask, he has no clue how far away he might be from Doyoung’s mouth, so he merely keeps going until there’s a collective “wow!” and he feels something soft, familiar against his mouth.</p><p>Oh.</p><p>Jaehyun’s brain short-circuits and he almost falls from his chair. He takes off his eyemask and looks at Doyoung with wide eyes, and his heart hammers in his chest with the sudden realization that he just kissed Doyoung in front of everyone. Doyoung stares back at him, having also taken off the eyemask, and he’s covering his mouth with a hand. He’s visibly as in shock as Jaehyun.</p><p>Jaehyun is about to apologize when the MCs laugh and clap.</p><p>“We knew you were a competitive duo, but you were really determined to win this one!” one of them laughs.</p><p>“There’s nothing left of your pepero so you’re taking first place!” the other cheers.</p><p>Jaehyun quickly understands that they’re making it pass as an accidental kiss, and immediately forces himself to smile.</p><p>“Yeah, sorry, I really wanted to win!” he says, trying to act cute.</p><p>Doyoung has also recovered and joins him into celebrating their newly acquired first place rank, and by the time Taeil and Haechan are getting ready everyone has moved on from the kiss. Jaehyun tries to say “sorry” with his eyes to Doyoung, and Doyoung looks at him for a few seconds more than necessary, as if saying “it’s okay.” Jaehyun sighs in relief, and he cheers with Jungwoo as Haechan eats the pepero at light speed. There are more cheers and laughter as he also pecks Taeil’s lips, but there is a leftover piece, meaning Jaehyun and Doyoung are first.</p><p>The MCs calculate the overall scores of each team, and Jaehyun gets pulled into a messy group hug as it’s his team that wins. They’re singing as the staff hands them presents, some beauty products and snacks, and he smiles as the losing team still gets some snacks. Filming gets wrapped up, and he’s bouncing on his feet as they finally head back to the dorms.</p>
<hr/><p>Jaehyun showers, and he pretty much skips to Doyoung’s room right after. His boyfriend is also done with his own shower, and he welcomes him with a bright smile. Jaehyun wastes no time to tackle his boyfriend on the bed, and they’re both giggling as they cuddle.</p><p>“How’s my cotton candy boyfriend doing?” Jaehyun asks, kissing Doyoung’s pink hair.</p><p>“I’m good, still a little shaken up by the fact that you kissed me publicly without warning me about it first,” Doyoung answers, teasing, and Jaehyun stiffens.</p><p>“I wasn’t planning on kissing you,” he says, “I really had no idea you were this close to me.”</p><p>“I know babe, I know,” Doyoung replies, “I’m thankful no one made a big deal out of it. If anything, it’ll make the fans go a little crazy.”</p><p>“It definitely will,” Jaehyun snickers, “also did you see how Haechan imitated me right after?”</p><p>“I’m pretty sure he had planned to kiss Taeil the moment it was announced they would be partners for the game,” Doyoung snickers back.</p><p>“True,” Jaehyun nods, “also, Johnny’s embarrassed face was the funniest thing I’ve seen in a while! Yuta was so confident but he was just sitting there like an idiot, it was hilarious.”</p><p>Doyoung joins him in laughing, and they calm down, just laying against each other.</p><p>“I want to spend some time kissing you before we have dinner,” Doyoung whispers, caressing Jaehyun’s lips with his thumb, “what do you think?”</p><p>Jaehyun moves Doyoung’s hand before leaning in and catching his lips into a short kiss.</p><p>“It’s a yes from me,” he whispers back.</p><p>Doyoung shuffles, gets on top of him and kisses him fully on the mouth, making Jaehyun moan happily.</p><p>“I love you,” Jaehyun confesses softly, his chest warming up with pure love and affection for his beloved.</p><p>“I love you more,” Doyoung answers, and Jaehyun knows he doesn’t need to hear more to reach peak happiness.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>As usual, don't hesitate to leave comments if you had fun reading this piece, it'd make me the happiest ♡ it took me over two months to get it done (I had no idea it would get this long) so it was quite a challenge to write it, but I'm very satisfied with how it came out.</p><p> <a href="https://twitter.com/dojaefairy">Twitter</a> | <a href="https://curiouscat.qa/dojaefairy">CuriousCat</a></p></blockquote></div></div>
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